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	The Church of the SubGenius is a completely unique organization 
among covert and information-sharing groups since its public facade of 
excessive and ludicrous fantasy has made it possible to be absolutely and 
publicly truthful about its aims and goals.  Its continuous cries of "wolf" 
deliberately destroy its credibility, making secrecy unnecessary.  The 
facts of its origins, nature, structure and intent appear to be another set 
of fantastic fictions.  The group's "hide in plain sight" approach to 
sensitive or dangerous information makes it possible for anyone to 
penetrate the organization and retrieve and disseminate any information, 
but without long contact with the group and its ideas the data will be 
hopelessly contaminated with fabrication.  An initiate of long standing 
and sufficient ability develops a sense of discernment by which it is 
possible to spot key phrases or jargon tags which aid an intuitive sorting 
process by which, to some degree, relatively truer "facts" can be 
separated from those less true or purposely created. I feel that my years 
of close contact with members of the church's hierarchy have given me 
some degree of discernment and that most of what follows is relatively 
factual.
	There are no secrets in the Church of the SubGenius and I will not be 
endangering myself or my family in any way, despite rumors to the 
contrary, because you, dear reader, will probably not believe a word of it.  
This is all just more quaint fiction.

	Where to begin?  There are so many impossible stories and bizarre 
events associated with the Church that it is hard to choose.  To set the 
tone of the piece let me tell you what I've seen with my own eyes while 
visiting Palmer Vreedeez (artist Hal Robins, aka Dr. Howl) in his San 
Francisco apartment in 1993.  Fellow SubGenius and artist Lies (Paul 
Mavrides - Robins took the name Vreedeez to create confusion over the 
identity of himself and Mavrides) claims, though not adamantly, to be an 
initiate of a european occult group called "The Black Cloud" 
headquartered in Paris, and he is known to make occasional trips there 
and elsewhere on the continent.  His appearance of indigence is contrived 
and I have never known him to be short of cash or unable to make 
irrational novelty purchases with no notice.  Lies and Vreedeez began an 
apparently innocent bragfight, each proclaiming their abilities in the 
most outrageous terms, but after a quarter hour without significant gain 
Vreedeez became agitated and suddenly swept lamp and telephone from 
an end-table.  He then seemingly lifted the table into the air WITHOUT 
TOUCHING IT.  It shot out of the window and crashed onto the sidewalk 
two floors below where it burst into flame.  Lies changed the subject 
immediately and the event was never spoken of again.
	Having set the tone with that story I can say pretty much anything I 
want to and be assured no reader will believe a word of it.  On the same 
visit I took a trip into the desert with Atwell, a harrowing experience all 
around, and saw him apparently drive his truck through a concrete wall 
with no damage of any kind to anything.  I was then shown a series of 
"missile silos" from which shone beams of bluish-green light for a period 
of about two hours around midnight (this was February of 1992 - there 
were a number of unusual gravitational and magnetic events in the area 
around that time).  There were also a number of what I took to be very 
large sandstone rock formations which appeared to change positions 
when I wasn't watching.
	This is nothing compared to the bizarre political and extralegal 
connections of the church.  Ivan Stang is known to have made trips to 
England and South America in the past few years to meet with, among 
others, high-ranking members of the P2 masonic group and an 
organization of which the Priory of Sion and Bilderberg Group are 
sanitized fictionalizations.  Stang and Philo Drummond are known to be 
33rd degree Masons, and Stang's position in a control group hinted at as 
the "Texas Mafia" is hereditary through his father, an ex-district 
attorney for Dallas and retired corporate lawyer.  Stang has employed a 
man named Doug Smith to pose as the "real-life" person of Ivan Stang.  
Stang, however, is his real name although he now uses the Smith name in 
his daily affairs.  I have met Smith and can assure you they are two 
different people of entirely different capabilities.  Smith seems to be a 
victim of arrested development and, though he is the nicest guy you'd 
ever want to meet, Stang is perfectly correct in calling him "dumb as 
shit."  I have never met Drummond but the stories I've heard from Onan 
Canobite (whose credibility is questionable to me, since "he" is, among 
other things, a transsexual ex-heroin addict once known as Cynthia 
Harris and was discharged from the WACs for crossdressing) are as 
strange as anything I have yet related.
	I am not sure of Stang's purpose in visiting South America, but he has 
told me that the "Medellin cartel" was entirely fabulous, having been 
created to cover the actions of the person known as G. Gordon Gordon 
(said by some to be a 300-pound black woman) who is employed by a 
branch of the U.S. Government to "keep the South American drug trade 
clean."  Stang has refused to explain his visit, saying that there are still 
people there who could be hurt by certain information, but he did say "I 
know for sure Von Daniken never got anywhere near those caves."
	It all sounds like insane lies, doesn't it?
	Though I would prefer not to go into too much detail at this time 
about its origins, since my own research is not complete, the Church of 
the SubGenius seems to have a direct connection with the program known 
among conspiracy nuts as The Neptune Agenda, and can trace its 
beginnings back to the discovery of sonar in 1915.  Immediately after the 
first use of sonar to detect German U-boats in the North Atlantic, 
unusual and cryptic Morse Code messages began to be received by 
listeners in many different areas.  A separate code of a logarithmic 
nature was created to communicate with what turned out to be aquatic 
mammals. I'm not going to elaborate further here because some of the 
things I've picked up about this seem very new-agey and stupid, having to 
do with ley lines and a global network of crystal skulls used as mind-
control transmitters to direct the actions of technologically-advanced 
(left-brain) humans.  Expatriate artist Marcel Duchamp appears to have 
played a major overseeing role in some way and the so-called 
"Philadelphia Experiment" appears to have been a cover story created by 
him to conceal developments of an entirely different nature.  Duchamp is 
known to have had connections with European Freemasonry and U.S 
Intelligence circles and certain of his artworks appear to combine both 
symbolic alchemical knowledge and apparatus of high-energy physics.  
His interaction with important figures in theoretical physics and 
mathematics is well-documented, and his "chess code" was in constant 
use by U.S. operatives in Europe during the Cold War and is still used in 
some Mediterranean operations.
	The stories associated with the church are endless, and it is 
impossible to tell where the truth lies.  I know from first-hand 
experience of the major figure in alternative music who has tunnels 
leading from his house to an armored bunker and seaplane dock on Puget 
Sound, and Church connections with occult/fraternal organizations in 
Seattle.  One SubGenius claims to have triggered the 1992 Portland 
earthquake with a head-launching ritual.  It goes on and on, and after a 
while the pattern starts to form and makes a weird kind of sense.  The 
only way to figure out what's "true" is to keep watching and keep quiet.
	Tips:  Check out stories of an installation inside Hoover Dam.  All the 
Groom Lake stories are cover for activities going on some 400 miles 
away.  Stories of unusual craft entering or leaving bodies of water bear 
investigating, as well as organizations closely associated with aquatic 
mammals.  John Lilly's studies are worthless, and he quit when he 
discovered he was being deliberately deceived.  He is very bitter about it, 
and will not discuss it.  Certain fields of New Age literature are conduits 
for open distribution of symbolically coded information related to the 
Neptune Agenda.  The documents pretending to be directly associated 
with it are false, and I wrote some of them.  The activities are known by 
that name only by outsiders but the disinformation channel established 
is now being used to distribute much factual information.  Certain 
originators' names and key phrases are the clue. Watch for the name 
Althotas and the term athanor, references to hollow trees, fountains, or 
caverns.  Check out alleged "lava tube " discoveries in central Oregon and 
northern California.  Much information about highly advanced, possibly 
alien, technology has appeared in "double language" essays in mycological 
journals and can be read as studies of fungi and the mechanics of 
sporulation.  And disbelieve 30% of what you've just read.

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	-Copyright NENSLO KDV 1995-
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