🚀 go-pugleaf

Plods Wooly Hats
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Seems that those bent bastards Devon and Cornwall police are that stuck
for something to do this year that they are having a blitz on petty
shoplifters to fill their time.

I'm certain that the parents of Kate Bushell and Sarah Payne will be ever
so pleased with the enormous amount of plod involved in this excercise
rather
than spending their time finding their killers. The reasons are obvious of
course, life, even of children is worth fuck all but MONEY pays Plods wages
and they certainly won't bite the hand that feeds them.

Anyway, Plod are disguising themselves extremely well this year. They are
nearly all wearing WOOLY HATS while waiting for you to commit the terrible
crime of knicking a bag of sweets!

The wooly hats are their for a reason. Look carefully and you will see that
they are being used to cover up a shiny black EARPIECE through which they
are kept in touch with other filth.

One here in Tiverton looks just like the Transexual Hayley in Corrie Street!

Another clue is that Plod Woolyhat will be standing in a predetermined spot
and will hardly move at all. He is there to chase after anyone trying a
"decamp".

Hope this helps you all. Have a Happy Xmas and keep your head down! I know
that some of you come a long way to shoplift because of the lack of any
security here at Tiverton.

It could also be handy to know that there is a very bent bastard who you
can always offer a bribe to if you get caught. His name is DC Robert "Dutch"
Holland and him and his mate DC Newnham are as bent as bent coppers come.

Dave

My personal address for injunctions and summonses:-

David Tilley
6 Lime Road,
Tiverton,
EX16 6JA
England