Re: Do You Want To Know For Sure That You Are Going To Heaven? The reason some people don't know for sure if they are going to H...

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#3930

From: Salty Thumb
Date: Mon, 18 Apr 2005 04:57

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RonGrossi382601@yahoo.com wrote in news:1113663501.404843.110580
@l41g2000cwc.googlegroups.com:

> 
> The reason some people don't know for sure
> if they are going to Heaven when they die
> is because they just don't know.
> 
> The good news is that you can know for
> sure that you are going to Heaven which is
> described in the Holy Bible as a beautiful
> place with no death, sorrow, sickness or
> pain.

The Prophesy of Watership

In actuality, Heaven is quite a vile place.  The reason why I am sure 
about this is just because I am quite sure.  In truth, Heaven is a 
noisome stockyard packed with souls awaiting processing for the 
consumption and enjoyment of more powerful beings.

But even more powerful beings sometimes have rules and thus only those 
who are Christians or who have otherwise been baptised are admitted (for 
they are generally more easily confused and thus easier to control).
The bad news is that even if you don't believe, you will baptised by 
proxy by a bunch of Mormons after you die and then it's off to the cosmic 
meat market you go.  Just pray you don't end up in a cosmic spam can with 
Ron.

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Subject: Re: Do You Want To Know For Sure That You Are Going To Heaven? The reason some people don't know for sure if they are going to Heaven when they die is because they just don't know. The good news is that you can know for sure that you are going to Heaven which is described in the Holy Bible as a beautiful place with no death, sorrow, sickness or pain. (newsgroup-post 140)
From: Salty Thumb <salty@notsogreenthumb.fake>
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Organization: Going Straight to Hell
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