🚀 go-pugleaf

"Porgy Tirebiter" <biteme@gmail.com> wrote in message 
news:zLO%g.9$wX.8@newssvr12.news.prodigy.com...
>
> You guys are missing the opportunity to have fun at THIER expense!
> Yep..thats right. keep a recorder connected and ready to go.When they call 
> have fun with them! I love to talk with them like i am 95 years old, hard 
> of hearing and stump-stupid hahaha..its a riot!
> Here is the ticket....screw up words bigtime...example.....
>
> Mortgage=mortuary
> Donation=Damnation
> Free offer= send it right over, THANK YOU! (then hang up)
> A good one...20 seconds into their speil....you say "HELLO!" starts them 
> over...and over...and over
> Try this one too...tell them to "Hold the wire! i'm looking for my hearing 
> aid" flip the receiver over so you can still hear, listen for the snyde 
> remarks hahaha
> Here is the trick, get them to hang up on YOU! you can do it!
> Dont be "nasty" just completely waste thier time.Keep THEM on the phone as 
> long as you can.
> Being "OLD/CRAZY" drives them completely nuts.I have had telemarketers 
> hang up on me, usually saying some like "Oh for the love of god!" before 
> terminating the call..
> Something like this is FUN.........
>
> TM= Hello, is this mr jones?
> YOU= this is mr jones........
> TM= good evening mr jones, i am calling on behalf of ugly women...how are 
> you tonight?
> YOU=What is your name?
> TM= This is David.....
> YOU=Hi david, i am 92 years old,i have no friends anymore, they all died 
> and so did my wife.Will you be my friend?(say this like you have no teeth 
> and or drunk)
> TM= er..ah..well....ok mr jones......
> YOU= THANK GOD! your a nice boy david, hold on a second david, my bag is 
> leaking again.....
> TM=CLICK!
> try it..its fun...you have nothing to lose and the collection of 
> recordings is a riot at family gatherings....
>
> When someone nutcase drops a truckload of lemons on your lawn.......make 
> lemonade!

One that works very quickly: simply say "Do you know that Jesus loves you?"
Unsettles them every time.

LT