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                           Frequently Asked Questions
                         (last revised August 2, 1994)

                                PART 5:  IN-JOKES


CONTENTS OF THIS PART:

     Far too much for a table of contents



                  "Good grief, it's turned into a running gag!"
                                                  --Kermit the Frog


WHAT IS AN IN-JOKE?

     Exactly what it sounds like.  You see, Superguy is, at heart, a humor
list.  It's a humor list that's been going for years, no less.  So over time
certain running gags, basic conventions, in-jokes, and insider humor have
developed, to the point where a new reader might need a road map to follow
along.  This particular Part of the FAQ is going to be a little looser than
other parts -- mostly because the subject matter is not conducive to
organization.
     Not all `in-jokes' are funny, by the way -- or are meant to be.  Often
they refer to events `everyone would know' (such as the destruction of
Washington D.C., or Intercontinental Salvage, or Radian's Apotheosis).
     Unless specifically stated to the contrary, the below refer to the
Superguy Subtopic.
     This is not necessarily a complete list.


1)   What does "Superguy" refer to?

     "Superguy" refers to one of five things:  The Superguy Mailing List, the
Superguy Subtopic; the Superguy Altiverse, the character Superguy, or the slang
term `Superguy.'
     The Superguy Mailing List is what you're reading right now. (See Part 1 of
the FAQ)
     The Superguy Subtopic is the Humorous Superheroic Fictional Subtopic of
the Mailing List.  (See Part 2 of the FAQ)
     The Superguy Altiverse (Altiverse 000SUPERGUY) is the universe the
Superguy Subtopic takes place in.  (See Part 6 of the FAQ)
     The character Superguy is the premier Super Hero on Earth (see below).
     The slang term `superguy' is used as a generic term for super heroes in
the Superguy Altiverse, out of respect for Superguy, the character.  So a bunch
of heroes are called superguys, any given hero is a superguy, and even Superguy
himself is a superguy.
     Though `Guy' is Gender-Male, `Superguy' is Gender-Neutral, for purposes of
this list.  No offense is meant.

2)   Who is Superguy?

     Superguy is the greatest hero of all time.  Single-handedly responsible
for saving millions of lives, Superguy is the strongest, fastest, smartest,
most noble, least vulnerable hero of them all.  No one else begins to be in his
league.  He is the greatest, bar none.  Take the best qualities of Superman,
Captain Marvel (all of them), Captain America, Captain Planet, and any other
copyrighted, trademarked character you can think of, take away their bad
traits, and you've got a hero just slightly below Superguy's level.
     Unfortunately, a guy like Superguy is so great, so powerful, and so
committed to Justice and Heroism that he operates under something of a tight
schedule.  As a result, he is constantly flying around the planet faster than
any eye can see, doing good deeds.  Never having time to pause and chat,
Superguy writes notes on Post It Notes (tm) at superspeed and leaves them
behind.  The only time he's ever paused is when he was dead, but even then no
one could get his coffin open.
     In other words, no one has actually seen Superguy.  Ever.  No one knows
what he looks like.  No one has any concept of who he or she actually is.
     With one exception.  When he came back to life, Superguy was seen briefly
by Burt Ward.  But no one believes Burt, so it effectively doesn't count.
     Superguy is essentially a Deus Ex Machina waiting to happen.  When all is
bleak and all else fails, Superguy saves the day when no one is looking.

3)   A lot of characters have the same secret identities as some of the Authors
on Superguy.  What gives?

     Even as the Author's Altiverse is populated by narcissistic power
fantasies that fill an Author's mind, so too are there characters created and
written by the Authors who are the 000SUPERGUY counterparts of the Authors
themselves.  For the most part, these neo-author characters are no different
than the other characters around them -- in fact, the most successful neo-
author characters are ones like High Jinx and Ramrod, who aren't particularly
powerful.
     In short, when you see an Author's name appear as part of a character in a
story, assume it has nothing to do with the Author him or herself.
     Some of the more active Author Characters are:


Figuremaster . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Dan Rossi
High Jinx *. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Dominic White
The Programmer **. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Gary Olson
Ramrod * . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Bill Dickson
Scholarman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Eric Alfred Burns
Spectrum . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Lawrence Brown
She-Devil. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Angi Shearstone
Superuser/Silly Wizzard/Ginsu 2000 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Bill Paul

(* -- Ramrod and High Jinx, although still `Bill Dickson' and `Dominic White',
and although still having exactly the same history, had their direct connection
to the Authors taken away by Pickle.  They are still considered Author
Characters)

(** -- The Programmer is a villain, not a hero)


     I am no doubt forgetting some.
     Also bear in mind that there are Special Agents Olson, Pongress, Bankert,
Burns, and Paul have the same last names as the five original Round Robin
Authors, but otherwise have no connection to the Authors.

4)   Who are the active Super Heroes based on non-author real people (not
celebrities)?

     Lots of real people have shown up as superguys, sometimes without even
knowing it was going to happen.  Some to this day do not know they are
prominent Superheroes on a fictional list (Andy Awesome coming to mind).  A
list of many of the most active ones is:

Andy Awesome . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Andrew Goodwin
Bad Driver * . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .(a) Kevin Pelletier
Bink . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Lisa Spencer Conlin
The Bostonian. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . T. Franklin Grady, Ph.D.
Cookie . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Rob Cook
Matt DeForrest **. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Matt DeForrest
The Fiddler *. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Guy Jara
Kevi . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Kevin Conlin
The Masked Bruce . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Mike Green
Miche *. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Michelle Skidmore
Particle Girl. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Jennifer Shearstone
Rat. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Linda Raszda
Skids *. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Steven Skidmore
T. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . David Trowbridge

(* -- Desceased)
(** -- Sfstory)

     Also -- Frank Orzechowicz (an Author), John Bankert (an Author), Suzanne
Aceti, and Jamie Sisler all seem to be becoming Super Heroes.  More as events
warrant.

5)   Who are the Super Heroes based on Celebrities?

     Smartman -- J. Danforth Quayle, the smartest man in the world.
     The Scarlet Shrubbery III -- Hillary Clinton, owner of the night
     Socks the Ninja Cat -- Socks Clinton, Ninja Cat
     Ninja Chelsea -- Chelsea Clinton, Ninja Wannabe
     Sean Connery -- member of Captain Hardeharharharlock's crew on the Video
          Arcadia
     Reaganbo -- Ronald Reagan, don't ask
     Late Show M00se -- David Letterman, all powerful Talk Show Host
     Jane Pauley and her Ninja Death Commandos -- sort of says it all
     The TOEJAMS -- The Cast of Saturday Night Live, agents of the M00se
          Illuminati
     The Incredibly Hulking Lou Ferrigno -- again, pretty easy to work out

     And many others forgotten to history, I'm sure.

6)   Who are the Supervillains based on Celebrities?

     How much time do you have?

     A partial list (in no particular order):

     The Skeptic (Ralph Nader); The Scarlet Shrubbery I (Barbara Bush);
     The Scarlet Shrubbery II (Nancy Reagan); Quaker Oatmeal Guy (Wilford
     Brimley); All of SNUCCI (see below); Badsport (Tonya Harding); Rush
     Limbaugh, Bob Dole, Ross Perot, and Bob Packwood (themselves); Paul
     Tsongas (evil deformed cyborg master of the Demolaks); Doctor Toon
     (Walt Disney, retired but not dead); the cast of "Awesome Force, the
     Movie" (Larry `Bud' Melman, Peewee Herman, Gilbert Gottfried, Rosanne
     Arnold, and many more); Jean Dixon (The Astrologer), and so on and so
     one...

     This is a list devoted to humor and parody.  As such, at any given time a
figure in the public eye could be pulled up as a villain.  At one point, for
example, Al Gore was part of a plot to reinvent and downsize superguys, which
led to his being a Villain, temporarily.  At another point, Dan Quayle (before
he became Superintelligent) was possessed by the psychic entity Gorgax and made
into a Supervillain.  At another point, the mind of Surplus Man took over Dana
Carvey, and the gestalt believed he was George Bush.  The cycle is kind of
never ending.

7)   Who or what is Satan T. Lucifer Jones.

     The Devil.  Mankind's eternal adversary.  The Duke of Smelly Feet himself.
Sort of.
     Satan T. Lucifer Jones was originally just the plain old Devil on Sfstory.
But after any number of shenanigans, he sort of evolved into the Devil we all
know and loathe on both Sfstory and Superguy today.  He alternates between
being an all-powerful demon and something of a nebbish.  He had more or less
lost all of his potential to strike fear into Men's hearts (to the point where
Sister Mary Ellen Hatchetnose -- the Nun on the Road -- would only attack him
if she thought he was protestant).  Recently, following a refresher course on
utter and complete evil and hideousness by the Late Vincent Price, Satan's come
back with a vengeance.
     Satan is probably the primary villain of the list, and the only
Superguy/Sfstory character to actively attack the Authors themselves.

8)   Why does Hell have a (tm) after it?

     Hell has always been nebulous on Superguy and Sfstory.  For a very long
time indeed, Hell was represented as a fleet of battlecruisers on Sfstory
(where the `science fiction only' rule kept Satan from working in his idiom)
and a chain of Chinese Restaurants called Fong's House of Oriental Delights on
Superguy (because of a prank by one of the Authors).  This later changed to
Fong's Enchilada Emporium, and finally Fong's Happy Belly of Mongolian Food
Wert.
     For bonus points, the next time your phone rings at home answer with a
Brooklyn accent and say "Fong's Happy Belly of Mongolian Food Wert, Fong ain't
here."  It is practically guaranteed to drive Telemarketers away from your
phone forever.
     During these alterations of Hell, Niccolo Machievelli forced a hostile
takeover of Hell and opened it up on the Market as a Public Company.  At this
time, Hell, Incorporated took out legal trademarks on the name of Hell.  Thus,
whenever Hell is used in a post of Superguy or Sfstory, legally a (tm) should
follow it.  There are implied (tm)'s in those cases that it is not followed, of
course.
     Since then, Satan has taken Hell, Inc. back over, but it's extreme
profitability has caused him to keep it on the market.  It is not known how his
shredding of his Board of Directors will affect Hell's investment standing,
however.
     As a side note -- so far, almost every person who has died in the Superguy
Altiverse has gone to Hell (tm).  The only exceptions seem to be known war
criminal Dr. Kilohertzmann and Supervillainess Batsman, both of whom apparently
went to Heaven.
     Go figure.

9)   What is Intercontinental Salvage, Inc?

     Intercontinental Salvage, Inc. is the premier reclamation and rebuilding
corporation on Planet Earth.  Whenever a super battle obliterates a monument, a
building, a city, a state, a moon, or what have you, Intercontinental Salvage
is called in to fix it right up.  As an added bonus, they seem to bring all the
residents back to life while they're at it.  By the time Intercontinental
Salvage is done, it's as if the battle never took place.
     Seem convenient?  Damn straight.  They do windows, too.

10)  What is Awesome Amalgamated?

     When Andy Awesome, hi-jinx (now High Jinx), Miche, Amazing Ginsu (now
Figuremaster), Bink, Miche, She-Devil and T -- the Awesome Force -- graduated
from college, they each decided to retire from being active superguys into the
private sector.  Andy Awesome, upon his graduation/retirement, formed a
corporation called Awesome Amalgamated as a shell organization to take the
National Aeronautics and Space Administration under private control and make it
a For-Profit company.  Awesome Amalgamated performed wonderfully, eventually
selling NASA -- now a profitable organization Robert Heinlein would have been
proud of -- back to the Government and pursuing other business interests.  It
is one of the most dynamic and powerful companies on Earth, proving that a
successful business could still have a sense of ethics.
     In the Future Storyline 2035, Awesome Amalgamated has essentially
purchased or assumed control of the entire planet, and is operating it as a
monopoly.  It is a Utopic society, where everyone is content and has enough to
eat.
     It's also creepy as Hell (tm).

11)  Why do some characters have (coincidence) and (no relation) after their
names?

     (Coincidence):  The Xolchipalian Defense Forces are an alien legion of
outstanding moral fiber, protecting cultures less advanced than themselves from
threats they cannot handle alone.  All Xolchipalians have red skin and white
hair, but otherwise look exactly like science fiction actors from earth and
even have the same names and attitudes of those actors.  This is utterly
coincidental.  They are not supposed to *be* Patrick Stewart, Jonathan Frakes,
or the like.  They simply look, sound and act just like Patrick Stewart and
Jonathan Frakes, and are named Patrick Stewart and Jonathan Frakes.  Just
coincidence.  Really.
     (No Relation):  Exactly what it says.  Agent Cooper (No Relation) likes
coffee and has a good attitude, for example, but he is in no way related to
Agent Cooper from "Twin Peaks."

12)  What is Bob City?

     Bob City (formerly named ThatReallyLargeCityOverThereopolis) is a dark
city.  A city where the wail of a saxophone fits in just naturally.  A place
where a man trusts his eyes, his gun, his bourbon and his paycheck, in that
order.  A place where a pretty face can hide a sweetheart or a killer,
depending on the time of day.
     In other words, Bob City is where every Film Noir movie ever made was
filmed.
     The other side of Bob City is that it rains there every night and has for
years.  As a result, it is the only inland city with a canal system and
windsurfing as a form of mass transit.
     The Extreme Team and the Punk with a Gun both haunt the streets of Bob.

13)  Why is the nefarious Dr. Fu Manchu such an easygoing guy?

     Fu is centuries old, as most people know, and he is the utter master of
all things criminal.  After a while, that gets draining, so he's taking several
years off.

14)  Who is the Gun Avenger?

     When terror strikes the streets of Bob or anywhere else in the world, when
convenience store clerks find themselves on the business end of a shotgun, when
the helpless are in their direst need, then does the .38 of the Gun Avenger
fire into the night!
     Not really.
     You see, whenever the Punk with a Gun tries to rob some place, almost
inevitably, someone else is robbing it.  So he knocks out the robbers and robs
the place himself.  But stories get confused and gradually, the legend of the
Gun Avenger has spanned the globe, despite the fact that the Gun Avenger never
existed.

15)  What are the Golden Grunions?

     The Golden Grunions are awards supposedly given out yearly to the best
(and worst) Characters, Stories and Authors in a huge out-of-continuity
ceremony.  Many people make light of them, but they are the big chance for the
readers to point out what they do and don't like.

16)  What's the deal with Radian?  Is she a hero or villain?  Is she a mage or
not?  Is she a vampire or not?  What gives?

     Herein lies a tale....
     Radian (Akane Moroshobi) started off life as a supporting character (Rad's
stepsister in the Rad series).  She later gained radiation projection powers
and was a charter member of CalForce.  In a later CalForce story, Radian met
her twin from the Sfstory altiverse (Shadebeam) and received a neck pendent
called the Z Medallion (along with a guiding spirit called Symon) from her.
Not too long after that, Radian got turned into a Vampire, but was able to use
her Radiation powers to force her cells back into life.  As a result, she has
some of the advantages of being a vampire, without any of the attendant
disadvantages (although she doesn't seem to possess the shapeshifting or
hypnotic powers of a vampire, or else needs blood to make them work).
     Later still, there was a war in Japan between the Dark Magi of the world,
for the power and title of Sorcerer Superlative (an accreditation referring to
the most powerful Dark Mage of them all).  Fallout from the Magic Wars caused
Faith's power to operate when Faith was asleep (which normally it would not),
and a devastating magical disruption ended all life on the planet except for
the members of CalForce and their friends at the blast's Epicenter, Wonder
Grunion, and Ramrod.  In this magicless world (known as the Wasteland), Akane
lived an entire lifetime, travelling the world and learning everything she
could.  In the end, she also learned how to escape it, returning to the
present, freeing Faith from his Dream, and defeating the real driving force of
the Realm -- the Cheshire Cat... or so she thought.  As part of the process,
Radian was filled with the power of the Dark, Corruptive Magic and became
Sorceress Superlative.  Indeed, she became more powerful than almost any
Sorcerer Superlative before her, as her radiation manipulation abilities
allowed her to use and process her magical power with far greater facility and
ease than any predecessor.
     As time progressed, both the Cheshire Cat (Chaos) and Symon (Order)
manipulated Radian to their own ends, drawing her towards an inevitable
situation that first arose when CalForce met China, the Bone Child.
     The Bone Child was another Archetypical force -- a girl who had always
lived in several bodies, whose blood was the key to power -- a mage could use
the power of the blood to become the greatest mage on Earth, a Vampire could
use the blood to become the most powerful Vampire on Earth.  Between the
overwhelmingly corruptive nature of the Dark Magic pervading her cells, and the
manipulations of the Cheshire Cat and Symon, Radian succumbed to the ultimate
temptation and killed China, drinking her potent blood until China's body was
dry.
     The blood could give a mage or a vampire ultimate power.  Radian was both
a Mage and a Vampire at once, as well as a manipulator of radiation.  As a
result, she became a true Dark Goddess.  Akane took her lover, Faith, and used
both her own magic and his reality warping powers in an attempt to turn the
entire of Planet Earth into Magical energy.  She would then use that magic to
propel herself, the Cheshire Cat and Symon into a State of Transcendence
(although Symon had fallen in love with Akane and actively sought to stop her).
     After a conflagration which swept the world, involving CalForce, the
Defense Squad, and Team Cynical, Akane achieved her goal of transcendence even
as her body was killed by Ramrod using the Punk with a Gun's Gun.
     As Akane began to Transcend, destroying the Earth in the process, she was
freed from the forces of destiny that guided her fate and got to make a choice
for herself for the first time.  She chose to save Earth instead of destroying
it, and sacrificed her power.  As a result, she died.  Faith, unable to deal
with his lover's death, used his power in an active way for the first time and
brought her back to life, achieving a natural transcendence himself.
     The Dark Magic Akane had once had was funneled into Shadebeam, whose
Quantum Signature is our of alignment with it, which in turn prevents Shadebeam
from being corrupted by it.  As a result, Radian is now sort of a hero again,
though a fugitive.  She is still kind of a vampire, but has no magic.  Plus she
has lots of people running around her head, which is weird.
     Sorry this one was so long.

17)  What is the M00se Illuminati?

     On Superguy, the M00se Illuminati is a conspiracy dedicated to the
overthrow of all world governments and the beginnings of a state of anarchy,
with agents operating where you least expect them.
     In Real Life, the M00se Illuminati is a conspiracy dedicated to the
overthrow of all world governments and the beginnings of a state of anarchy,
with agents operating where you least expect them.
     It may be the only Secret Conspiracy in either universe to advertise
openly, by the way.
     Real life folks looking for information on the eye in the pyramid with the
antlers should contact Bill Dickson ("Pickle") and Dominic White ("the
Artiste"), the publishers of the Conspiracy newsletter.

18)  Is Evan Pongress ("Shadowman") really dead?

     In real life, Evan Pongress (Round Robin Alumni and writer of the
Annihilator, Burt Ward and Adam West, the adventures of the Starship Winaprise,
and so much more) is alive and well and living in a Spiritually Oriented
Community with a beautiful woman, and leading a fulfilling, contented life
where he is working in a field that interests him with people who affirm him
and provide a sense of community and balance for him.
     It is all right to loathe Evan on general principle.
     In the Author's Altiverse, though, Evan has won the Authorial awards for
being most consistently dead.  He died once, way back when, and was cremated,
his ashes being used to make ashtrays.  They he was resurrected several times
during an Author's War, and killed horribly every time.  Then he was safely
resurrected again, and had taken on an Author's name, and generally was
preparing for a good time.  And then every Evan Pongress in every Altiverse was
horribly killed in a war against the evil Nazi Barney (Herr Kiddievinkel).
Evan's dead amalgamated spirit was removed from the Multiverse and entered a
Cathedral of Death, where his muse was Death Herself.  And there they sit,
waiting, Death and Shadowman.
     Waiting for what?  Who knows -- with as complete a real life as Evan has,
you think he writes for *this* thing any more?

19)  What were the five billion George Bushes?

     When Dangerousman blew up Washington D.C. to stop Surplus Man, every known
branch of the U.S. Government had a plan in place to save the President in
event of the destruction of the Capital.  They all went into effect
simultaneously, and as a result George Bush was split among them into five
billion separate bodies, each with a shadow of his own intellect, using mass
gained from Surplus Man (who was at Ground Zero in the explosion).  Eventually,
they were recombined and made war against the other George Bush, who was
actually Surplus Man's mind thinking he was George Bush in Dana Carvey's Body
disguised as Saddam Hussain.
     The compiler of this FAQ wishes to make it plain that he made none of this
up.
     Eventually, George Bush was again made complete and whole, and eventually
went completely insane after Manny Seconds won the Presidency from him.

20)  What was so bad about Ramrod's singing career?

     Ramrod's career as a singer started (not counting a wild renditions of
Oingo Boingo's "No One Lives Forever" at London's Slug and Garter) when the
Government used an agent named Ennui to seduce and control Ramrod.  They then
made Ramrod into the ultimate prepubescent teen heartthrob, having him sing
songs to make the youth of America conform to an ideal of obedient mediocrity
with such bubblegum hits as "Girl, it's you," "Be True, Girl," "You Can Believe
in Me, Girl," and the Seminal "Trust the Government, Girl" (The Chorus being
"You Got to/Trust the government, girl/Trust the government, girl/Trust the
government, girl/Now stop worrying and look at my butt").
     The music was utterly wretched and popular as Hell.  Ramrod's best friend,
High Jinx, actually tried to assassinate Ramrod to prevent him from continuing.
Finally, it took the spirit of Batsman (who Ramrod loved), Gus the Sentient
Apple IIgs, and Elvis himself to cause Ramrod to recant his views during a
Nationally Televised concert (featuring a blimp rising out of the Washington
D.C. Reflecting Pool).
     Thus, the Government stopped their ad campaign, and most of Ramrod's
target audience have reached puberty and realized Ramrod utterly sucked.  Thus,
the long term damage has been minimal.

21)  What does the phrase `Stoking the Cow' mean?

     Team Cynical's power needs are taken care of via a high-methane producing
cow they keep well fed (or `stoked').

22)  How did Dan Quayle get so Smart?

     Dan Quayle, while wandering around the Pentagon, attempted to photocopy a
body part with an experimental Xerox Machine.  This caused Dan Quayle to become
replicated five billion times, and the five billion Dan Quayles stretched Dan's
natural ignorance and good natured stupidity that the vacuum left in the
original Dan Quayle's mind was filled with the most mind-staggeringly complex
knowledge imaginable.  As the Five Billion Dan Quayles were all sent to Hell
(tm) to satisfy a deal Satan T. Lucifer Jones had made for all the Souls on
Earth, there is little chance of Dan regaining his birthright stupidity.

23)  What is Spam?  What is Neo-Spam?  What is Spam Lite?  (SFSTORY MOSTLY, BUT
APPLIES TO ALL ALTIVERSES)

     Spam -- long thought to be processed meat prepared by the Hormel
Corporation, is actually a complex mathematical substance.  Put into simple
layman's language, Spam is a three dimensional representation of a fourth
dimensional vector through space/time.  As such, Spam, when properly used, is
capable of almost any feat.  It is used by advanced civilizations as a clean
power source and as a method of interstellar travel.  It is the one substance
that can facilitate Inter-Altiversal Travel without causing the travellers to
vomit.  Used improperly, it causes space/time/reality warps and rifts capable
of replacing people with five tons of elephant dung (to use a graphic example).
The one feat Spam is incapable of is safe digestion.
     Spamologists recommend using an ABPSARI (Automatic Beet Peeler and Sub-
Atomic Re-Integrator) to properly manipulate Spam.
     Neo-Spam looks just like really old Spam, and tastes even worse.  It is
created whenever a substance is hurled into a Black Hole.  The incredible
gravity of a black hole crushes the substance into a Fourth Dimensional Vector,
which eventually causes the substance to take on Spamical properties.  It then
becomes revolted with the substance and hurls it back out into Space, where it
becomes Neo-Spam.
     Neo-Spam is somewhat safer than Spam, but does not yield as much power.
     Spam Lite seems to be a naturally occurring substance, much like Spam
itself, but it is highly volatile.  Little more is known of it.

24)  SFSTORY:  What on Planet Earth in the Sfstory Altiverse has been
destroyed?

     A partial list:

     Texas and Oklahoma (Destroyed by the launching of Stetson Tyler's PDFOTS
          Alamo's Revenge)
     Boston (Destroyed by a ship going to warp speed on Bay State Road)
     Portland and Freeport, Maine (Destroyed by a Spam accident that hurled
          them into space)
     Martha's Vineyard (Destroyed by FART Fighters in a battle with
          Ultranatchwald)
     Manchester (Destroyed in a battle between Satan's Armada and the HMS
          Golden Lance)
     Rhode Island, Syracuse, and Newburgh (Destroyed by the launching of an
          ancient Starship below Rhode Island)
     New Haven, Ct. (Destroyed in a Battle between Ultranatchwald and a Satanic
          Android)
     Fort Kent, Maine (Destroyed in an invasion by the Nasty Killer Death
          Beetles from Tampon IV [or NKDBFTIV])
     The Entire Moon (Destroyed by the CBS Eye)

     And no doubt some part of New England I've forgotten.  It is worth noting
that in every space battle Lord Sabre writes on Sfstory, part of New England is
destroyed.

25)  The story 2035 is set in the future with a lot of familiar characters, but
it seems to contradict current storylines.  What gives?

     2035 was begun with the permission of the various Authors on Superguy, and
proceeded from the assumption that the current status of Superguy *at* *that*
*time* would continue along the lines the writer set out for it.  Of course,
this have not proceeded that way -- but there is little or nothing that says
they could not revert.
     For example, Summer of Team M.E.C.H.A. was not superpowered at the time of
her death, but the possibility exists that she will lose her powers.  Miche and
Skids were known to have lived into the 2000's (and Miche is still alive, as of
2035), but it is not exactly unknown for heroes to come back to life in
Superhero stories.
     There is little that could not change to return to the world of 2035, and
there are some signs (such as the creation of the Fiddler's Green Cemetery and
the increasing role of Awesome Amalgamated in Governmental affairs) of it's
eventual coming to pass.

26)  What heroes have died and how?

     There have been four Superheroic deaths `on screen' that I can remember as
of this writing.

     The Fiddler (Guy Jara) of the Awesome Force was killed in their battle
against Citrus Man, who turned the Fiddler into a Banana.  Superguy, who was
passing by, ate the banana, killing the Fiddler and giving him the noblest of
all fates.
     Lieutenant Justice of Solutions Unlimited died in the battle of Akron.
     Miche and Skids (Michelle and Steven Skidmore) of the Awesome Force were
killed in an explosion in Russia.
     Also, Faith (Gary Shapiro) and Andy Awesome (Andrew Goodwin) have both
been killed but come back to life, and Faith, Gus, and Lulu the Dangerousmobile
have all Transcended their mortal existence, which isn't quite the same.
     Finally, Jan Taylor, who only appeared in Superguy as a potential love
interest of Trashman in the original series, was later revealed to have become
the superheroine Force, who was killed in Dangerousman's destroying of
Washington D.C.

27)  Why is Elvis revered as a deity?

     To quote from the Gospel According to Mojo Nixon--

          Elvis is everywhere,
          Elvis is everything,
          Elvis is everybody,
          Elvis is still the king.

     In Superguy, this is the literal case.  Elvis pervades the Multiverse.
Elvis is the one being above the Authors.  Elvis is the very spirit of all that
is good and bad, right and wrong, fat and thin.  When the Multiverse needed to
be recreated, it was done off of an old Elvis record.  When the Man with Two
First Names purchased the Multiverse, he Purchased it from Elvis.

28)  Are the Burt Ward and Adam West on Superguy the same as the Burt Ward and
Adam West that starred on the Batman TV series?

     Well, not really.  Think of Adam West and Burt Ward as of the time *of*
the Batman TV series for their proper ages and haircuts.  However, Adam West
and Burt Ward actually used to be the Camp Superheroes Batman and Robin, but
they gave up their identities and instead took on the new secret identities as
Adam West and Burt Ward, eccentric, out of work actors.  They occasionally
attempt to fight crime in these identities, but it tends to fail miserably.
     Furthermore, Adam is a psychotic bastard when it comes to Burt, and Burt
himself is a mischievous little boy who wants to be liked... and who is also an
utterly sex-crazed little weasel you would not let play any of your reindeer
games.  But occasionally tried to strike out on his own as a hero, becoming
such luminaries as Wrad (he of the awesome Sunburn) and the Taupe Trenchcoated
Wramrod.  He usually gets away with these escapades with only minor stitches.
     Burt is also noteworthy as being the one person who found Superguy's body
and protected it, during Death of Superguy II.

29)  What is the deal with the numbers 5 and 23, as well as the colors red,
green, black, blue and gold?

     In the Round Robin storyline, the Universe was created by the Five Lords
of the Outer Darkness.  The Gold Lord represented creation, the Red Lord
Destruction, the Black Lord Chaos, the Green Lord Order, and the Blue Lord
Balance.  As there were five of them, five became a number of power.  23 became
another way to say five, as two plus three equals five.  Note that 32, 14 and
41 all work just as well, but aren't as common.
     After the reunification of the Lords of the Outer Darkness and their
counterparts, the Serfs of the Inner Light, forming together with the original
Middle Managers of the In-Between Greyness (it's a long story), it seemed like
the color stuff and five stuff had ended.  However, both Eric Alfred Burns
("Lord Sabre") and Gary Olson ("the Swede") have since implied that the entire
Multiverse is based around the number five and these colors in some strange
way.

30)  What is the Flatphoot Phollies?/What is the destruction of Washington
D.C./Why does Trashman hate Dangerousman so much?/What is the Cult of Tip
O'Neill?

     In the early days of the list, the first large scale crossover was the
Flatphoot Phollies -- a plot perpetuated by Flatphoot and Special Special Agent
Richard Less of the Mega-Intelligence Bureau to kill all unregistered
Superheroes.  They held a Superheroic Convention at the Sheraton in Washington,
D.C., and all the Superheroes on the list went to it.  However, the evil plots
that Flatphoot and Richard Less were going to perpetuate never got past passing
one piece of drugged pizza to Dangerousman.
     However, Dangerousman himself met Relativity Woman at the convention, and
the two decided to get married.  They went down to a Jewelry Store for a
wedding ring, only to discover the massive Surplus Man was robbing the store.
     In the following fight, Dangerousman was forced to defeat the villain by
unleashing his Extremely Dangerous Power (namely, the power to set off a
thermonuclear explosion every time he stomped his foot).  The resulting
explosion destroyed Washington D.C., and apparently killed every Superhero on
the list.
     The reason for this was simple -- there were lots of unused heroes lying
around.  This way, anyone not brought back was dead, and so they never had to
be dealt with again.
     The radiation mutated various congressmen into the Cult of Tip O'neill,
who fought against Intercontinental Salvage as they rebuilt Washington D.C.
George Bush found himself being saved by dozens of `Save the Prez' schemes, and
as a result, was replicated five billion times.
     Eventually, all of this was taken care of, and every hero and villain on
the list appeared later.  Apparently, the explosion killed no one.  Not even
Surplus Man.
     It was not until years later that it was revealed that Jan Taylor -- the
Superheroine Force and the beloved of Trashman -- actually was killed by the
blast, laying the foundation for a deep and abiding enmity between the two.

31)  What is SNUCCI?  What was SNURCCI?

     SNUCCI stands for the Seriously Nasty Undead Cthuloid Cultists,
Incorporated -- an organization devoted to bringing Cthulu into the Superguy
Altiverse and having him obliterate everything.  It is made up of Talk Show
Hosts, all of whom have died and come back as hideous zombies.  Led by Jay
Leno, the King of Late Night, and Phil Donahue, their religious leader, SNUCCI
is a difficult bunch of opponents to beat, because they can't really be hurt.
The M00se Illuminati is one of SNUCCI's most implacable enemies, and their
agent, David Letterman, had successfully infiltrated them for a time.  In his
incarnation as Late Night M00se, he fought against SNUCCI along with Teri Garr
and the World's Most Dangerous Band.  Since then, his powers have greatly
increased and he has become Late Show M00se -- and although Jay Leno is still
officially King of Late Night, it is clear the SNUCCI's dominance of Late Night
Television and the minds of the masses have been subverted by the M00se
Illuminati.
     Another sign of SNUCCI's recent weakness came after their success in
bringing Cthulu into the Superguy Altiverse.  Cthulu did not reward them or
make them all powerful, but instead settled down with a nice family and married
Rosanne Barr.  SNUCCI attempted to adapt, becoming SNURCCI (The Seriously Nasty
Undead Rosanne and Cthuloid Cultists, Incorporated), but they never really
represent a great threat from that point forward.  Since Rosanne was caught
cheating and Cthulu was driven out of our Universe just before he was ready to
begin his reign of terror, SNUCCI has again begun their plots, but they have a
lot of ground to regain before they become a serious threat, again.

32)  What is the Mask Principle?  Why don't Superguys have their secret
identities discovered all the time?

     There is a basic law of nature in the Superguy Milliverse called the Mask
Principle (first suggested by veteran Sfstory Author Patrick McCoy).  The Mask
Principle states, essentially, that if a person covers their eyes with any sort
of mask, be it a full face mask, a cowl, a domino mask, eye makeup, a dark pair
of sunglasses, or what have you, with the explicit intention of hiding his
identity, then close friends, relatives, enemies and the like will be wholly
unable to pierce the disguise, despite the fact that the hero's face is mostly
exposed, his voice hasn't changed, his mannerisms haven't changed, and so
forth.  Thus, though Mike Green looks, sounds and acts just like his heroic
counterpart, no one realizes he's the Masked Bruce because of the Mask
Principle.
     The Mask Principle can be overloaded.  For example, Kent Clark, aka Mighty
Guy, wears glasses in his civilian identity to invoke the Mask Principle.
However, the fact that he's the size of a small continent, destroys everything
around him, and has midnight blue hair are too much for a poor law of the
universe, so it's painfully obvious Kent is Mighty Guy.

33)  I see Unorthodox Girl referred to as Unorthodox Lass sometimes -- why?  I
see Unorthodox Lass referred to as Unorthodox Girl sometimes -- why?

     Trudy Unorthodox is the superguy called Unorthodox Lass *and* the superguy
called Unorthodox Girl. It's an Unorthodox way to keep a codename, so she does
it.  She gets very mad when people mess it up, calling her Girl when her name
is Lass, and vice versa.

34)  What other in-jokes are there?

     Lots.  But they will have to wait for later FAQ editions.  In the
meantime, if you have a question or comment about these in-jokes or suggestions
about in-jokes left out of this edition, please send it to
rubicon@drycas.club.cc.cmu.edu, with the subject header FAQ:  In Jokes.