🚀 go-pugleaf

(writ in its own hand last night IN the yuppie bar in a cold sweat)

One more beer & I'll be fine really.  This guy next to me says,
"Did you see 'Boyz n the Hood'?"  wait, lemme backup.

"Ruby Tuesdays".  Wife at college library.  Came to mall to spend
gift certificate from wedding last saturday.  GOT the change FROM
the gift certificate, WENT to yuppie bar to purchase alcohol.
Succeeded.  Remember trying to score alcohol?  Ah, the sweet gauzy
scenes of youth.  Anyways, scumbag jerkoff in white shirt & tie
asks scumbag friend "Did you SEE boys in the hood?".  Other scumbag
loser with big cashwad starts going off about "hey, I ain't paying
money for that shit!  let 'em get their handouts from someone else!"
etc. etc.

Out came the machine gun.

The MG34.

The finest squad arm the Wehrmacht ever had.  Hiram Maxim got
nothin on me.  It's a belt fed gun, so I nudge the fella next to
me, "Hey, Buddy, you feed this belt for me?"  "Yeah, sure!  Fear
the gov't that fears your gun, right?"  and off we went.

We're talkin high velocity fun here my fellow americans, and for
those of you without the pleasure, get yourself a visa, come on
over to the land of easy guns and cheap ammo and SHOOT SOME SHIT UP!
You'll be glad you did!

Late for the wife, Jeapordy-with-no-volume over now here in the
bar, George Bushs' lizard face fills the screen.  Sirens in the
distance.  I step away from the one spot in the bar not sticky
with human grease & liquid.  I need a vacation.  But then, after
all, this IS the next best thing.

MEANWHILE,

Sumner Redstone, multibillionare, former WWII codebreaker and all
around swell guy sits back and owns MTV.  Hi Sumner, my name is
Robert and I represent the Helping Hands Acceptance Corporation...