🚀 go-pugleaf

UNDERBITCH ANGLE

Give joy to Serena & Venus for their doubles championship win
yesterday (Sunday, 2 August) @ Stanford, as well as to Serena for
making the quarterfinals in singles and to Venus for going to the
finals against Marion Bartoli.

Bartoli beating out Venus for #1 was a sort of victory of manners over
form. In the latter category, as the world knows, Venus does the tall,
slender, strong & graceful whereas OTOH Bartoli has a somewhat boxy
build which she seriously aggravates by a jerky service routine whose
awkwardness stops just a cunt hair short of being grotesque.
However she's 4 years younger than Venus, a fact which on court
Bartoli rubbed in at every opportunity by jumping and pumping between
points, whereas the trailing V was looking by contrast the proverbial
OAT or "Old And Tired". Even Bartoli's strange serve may be a planned
device to lull her opponent into feeling that anything so creaky
looking will come across weak.

Bartoli got the edge on manners by poor-mouthing in the pre-game
interview. 'Unless I get nearly all of my first serves in, Venus will
_kill_ me,' she coyly told the TV face. Whereas
V, coming off her 6/0, 6/1 wipe-out of Dementieva the previous night,
had her jaw stuck out like battleship's prow, and said to the effect
that she needed just to keep her game going. PGBF = "Pride Goeth etc."

With the lovely convenience of hindsight, which by forethought still
may be converted to good use, we see that Venus should have had
someone to talk her down before the finals. What she shuddased: "I'm
the underbitch in this match. Marion has 4 big years on me. She beat
Stosur who beat Serena who, as everybody knows, beat me. My trashing
Dementieva last night = only neutral value today because we have to
weigh encouragement against overconfidence."  That's called getting
down in the pre-game limbo dance.

IMHO Venus should also review all her in play histrionics on tape when
she blew those many shots. Facing a weaker player one can and should
merely blow off the occasional error. Against a strong opponent,
however, one should train oneself well in advance to realize that all
self-indulgent signs of exasperation simply encourage the competition.
Therefore one should work out a simple routine to minimize the self-
defeating dramatics. Maybe only eyes to Heaven, a grip on the racket
and breath control?  Discipline for eventual triumph.

Venus being quite noticeably the oldest woman in the top twenty,
should she manage to get to the finals of another tournament, then she
might tell the TV face that she's repping the senior citizens. Get
both a laugh and a firm grip on that valuable underbitch angle.