🚀 go-pugleaf

private, that persons should have
the utmost dread of such envious thoughts; which if allowed tend
exceedingly to quench the Spirit of God, if not to provoke Him finally
to forsake them. And when such a spirit has much prevailed, and persons
have not so earnestly strove against it as they ought to have done, it
has seemed to be exceedingly to the hindrance of the good of their
souls. But in some other instances, where persons have been much
terrified at the sight of such wickedness in their hearts, God has
brought good to them out of evil; and made it a means of convincing them
of their own desperate sinfulness, and bringing them off from all
self-confidence.

The drift of the Spirit of God in His legal strivings with persons, has
seemed most evidently to be, to bring to a conviction of their absolute
dependence on His sovereign power and grace, and an universal necessity
of a mediator. This has been effected by leading them more and more to a
sense of their exceeding wickedness and guiltiness in His sight; their
pollution, and the insufficiency of their own righteousness; that they
can in no wise help themselves, and that God would be wholly just and
righteous in rejecting them and all that they do, and in casting them
off for ever. There is however a vast variety as to the manner and
distinctness of such convictions.

As they are gradually more and more convinced of the corruption and
wickedness of their hearts, they seem to themselves to grow worse and
worse, harder and blinder, and more desperately wicked, instead of
growing better. They are ready to be discouraged by it, and oftentimes
never think themselves so far off from good as when they are nearest.
Under the sense which the Spirit of God gives them of their sinfulness,
they often think that they differ from all others; their hearts are
ready to sink with the thought that they are the worst of all, and that
none ever obtained mercy who were so wicked as they.