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Article #70Regaining Self-Control
From: Troy Varange
Date: Fri, 27 Dec 1996 00:00
Date: Fri, 27 Dec 1996 00:00
250 lines
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12950 bytes
REGAINING SELF-CONTROL - STEPS IN OVERCOMING MASTURBATION
Be assured that you can be cured of your difficulty. Many have
been, both male and female, and you can be also if you determine
that it must be so.
This determination is the first step. That is where we begin.
You must decide that you will end this practice, and when you
make that decision, the problem will be greatly reduced at once.
But it must be more than a hope or a wish, more than knowing
that it is good for you. It must be actually a DECISION. If
you truly make up your mind that you will be cured, then you
will have the strength to resist any tendencies which you may
have and any temptations which may come to you.
After you have made this decision, then observe the following
specific guidelines:
1. Never touch the intimate parts of your body except
during normal toilet processes.
2. Avoid being alone as much as possible. Find good company
and stay in this good company.
3. If you are associated with other persons having this
same problem, YOU MUST BREAK OFF THEIR FRIENDSHIP. Never
associate with other people having the same weakness.
Don't suppose that two of you will quit together, you
never will. You must get away from people of that kind.
Just to be in their presence will keep your problem
foremost in your mind. The problem must be taken OUT OF
YOUR MIND for that is where it really exists. Your mind
must be on other and more wholesome things.
4. When you bathe, do not admire yourself in a mirror. Never
stay in the bath more than five or six minutes -- just
long enough to bathe and dry and dress AND THEN GET OUT OF
THE BATHROOM into a room where you will have some member
of your family present.
5. When in bed, if that is where you have your problem for
the most part, dress yourself for the night so securely
that you cannot easily touch your vital parts, and so
that it would be difficult and time consuming for you to
remove those clothes. By the time you started to remove
protective clothing you would have sufficiently controlled
your thinking that the temptation would leave you.
6. If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed,
GET OUT OF BED AND GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND FIX YOURSELF
A SNACK, even if it is in the middle of the night, and
even if you are not hungry, and despite your fears of
gaining weight. The purpose behind this suggestion is
that you GET YOUR MIND ON SOMETHING ELSE. You are the
subject of your thoughts, so to speak.
7. Never read pornographic material. Never read about your
problem. Keep it out of mind. Remember -- "First a
thought, then an act." The thought pattern must be
changed. You must not allow this problem to remain in
your mind. When you accomplish that, you soon will be
free of the act.
8. Put wholesome thoughts into your mind at all times. Read
good books -- Church books -- Scriptures -- Sermons of
the Brethern. Make a daily habit of reading at least one
chapter of Scripture, preferably from one of the four
Gospels in the New Testament, or the Book of Mormon.
The four Gospels -- Matthew, Mark, Luke and John --
above anything else in the Bible can be helpful because
of their uplifting qualities.
9. Pray. But when you pray, don't pray about this problem,
for that will tend to keep it in your mind more than ever.
Pray for faith, pray for understanding of the Scriptures,
pray for the Missionaries, the General Authorities, your
friends, your families, BUT KEEP THE PROBLEM OUT OF YOUR
MIND BY NOT MENTIONING IT EVER -- NOT IN CONVERSATION WITH
OTHERS, NOT IN YOUR PRAYERS. KEEP IT _OUT_ of your mind!
The attitude of a person toward his problem has an affect on how
easy it is to overcome. It is essential that a firm commitment
be made to control the habit. As a person understands his
reasons for the behavior, and is sensitive to the conditions or
situations that may trigger a desire for the act, he develops
the power to control it.
We are taught that our bodies are temples of God, and are
to be clean so that the Holy Ghost may dwell within us.
Masturbation is a sinful habit that robs one of the Spirit
and creates guilt and emotional stress. It is a habit that is
totally self-centered, and secretive, and in no way expresses
the proper use of the procreative power given to man to fulfill
eternal purposes. It therefore separates a person from God
and defeats the gospel plan.
This self-gratifying activity will cause one to lose his
self-respect testimony becomes weak, and missionary work and
other Church callings become burdensome offerings.
To help in planning an effective program to overcome the
problem a brief discription is given of how the reproductive
organs in a young man function.
The testes in your body are continually producing hundreds of
millions of reproductive cells call spermatozoa. These are
moved up a tube called the vas deferens to a place called the
ampulla where they are mixed with fluids from two membranous
pouches called seminal vesicles and the prostate gland.
The resultant fluid when the seminal vesicles are full a signal
is sent to the central nervous system indicating they are ready
to be released, how often depending on such things as exercise,
state of health, etc., occasionally or several times a week,
for others.
It is normal for the vesicles to be emptied occasionally at
night during sleep when called by the central nervous system.
Often an erotic dream is experienced at the same time, and
is a part of this normal process. If, instead masturbating,
the reproductive system is operating at a more rapid pace,
trying to keep up with the loss of semen. When he stops the
habit, the body will continue to produce at his increased rate,
for an indefese are not harmful and are to be endured until
the normal central nervous system pathway of release.
As one meets with his Priesthood Leader, a program for
overcoming masturbation can be implemented using some of the
techniques mentioned above. Remember it is essential that
a regular report program be agreed on, so progress can be
recognized and failures understood and eliminated.
Suggestions:
1. Pray daily, ask for the gifts of the Spirit, that which
will strengthen you against temptation. Pray fervently
and not out loud when the temptations are the strongest.
2. Follow a program of vigorous daily exercise. The exercises
reduce emotional tension and depression and are absolutely
basic to the solution of this problem. Double your
physical activity when you feel stress increasing.
3. When the temptation to masturbate is strong, yell _STOP_
to those thoughts as loudly as you can in your mind and
then recite a prechosen Scripture or sing an inspirational
hymn. It is important to turn your thoughts away from
the selfish need to indulge.
4. Set goals of abstinence, begin with a day, then a week,
month, year and finally commit to never doing it again.
Until you commit yourself to _never again_ you will always
be open to temptation.
5. Change in behavior and attitude is most easily achieved
through a changed self-image. Spend time every day
imagining yourself strong and in control, easily overcoming
tempting situations.
6. Begin to work daily on a self-improvement program. Relate
this plan to improving your Church service, to improving
your relationships with your family, God and others.
Strive to enhance your strengths and talents.
7. Be outgoing and friendly. Force yourself to be with others
and learn to enjoy working and talking to them. Use
principles of developing friendships found in books such as
_How to Win Friends and Influence People_ by Dale Carnegie.
8. Be aware of situations that depress you or that cause
you to feel lonely, bored, frustrated or discouraged.
These emotional states can trigger the desire to masturbate
as a way of escape. Plan in advance to counter these
low periods through various activities, such as reading
a book, visiting a friend, doing something athletic, etc.
9. Make a pocket calendar for a month on a small card. Carry
it with you, but show it to no one. If you have a lapse
of self control, color the day black. Your goal will be
to have _no black days_. The calendar becomes a strong
visual reminder of self control and should be looked at
when you are tempted to add another black day. Keep your
calendar up until you have at least three clear months.
10. A careful study will indicate you have had the problem at
certain times and under certain conditions. Try and
recall, in detail, what your particular times and
conditions were. Now that you understand how it happens,
plan to break the pattern through counter activities.
11. In the field of psychotherapy there is a very effective
technique called _aversion therapy_. When we associate or
think of something very distasteful with something which
has been pleasurable, but undesirable, the distasteful
thought and feeling will begin to cancel out that
which was pleasurable. If you associate something very
distasteful with your loss of self-control it will help
you to stop the act. For example, if you are tempted to
masturbate, think of having to bathe in a tub of worms,
and eat several of them as you do the act.
12. During your toileting and shower activities leave the
bathroom door or shower curtain partly open, to discourage
being alone in total privacy. Take cool brief showers.
13. Arise immediately in the mornings. Do not lie in bed awake,
no matter what time of day it is. Get up and do
something. Start each day with an enthusiastic activity.
14. Keep your bladder empty. Refrain from drinking large
amounts of fluids before retiring.
15. Reduce the amount of spices and condiments in your
food. Eat as lightly as possible at night.
16. Wear pajamas that are difficult to open, yet loose and
not binding.
17. Avoid people, situations, pictures or reading materials
that might create sexual excitement.
18. It is sometimes helpful to have a physical object to use
in overcoming this problem. A Book of Mormon, firmly
held in hand, even in bed at night has proven helpful in
extreme cases.
19. In very severe cases it may be necessary to tie a hand to
the bed frame with a tie in order that the habit of
masturbating in a semi-sleep condition can be broken.
This can also be accomplished by wearing several layers
of clothing which would be difficult to remove while
half asleep.
20. Set up a reward system for your successes. It does not
have to be a big reward. A quarter in a receptacle each
time you overcome or reach a goal. Spend it on something
which delights you and will be a continuing reminder of
your progress.
21. Do not let yourself return to any past habit or attitude
patterns which were part of your problem. Satan Never
Gives Up. Be calmly and confidently on guard. Keep a
positive mental attitude. You can win this fight! The
joy and strength you will feel when you do will give your
whole life a radiant and spiritual glow of satisfaction
and fulfillment.
--
Cheers!
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X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII-7-bit X-Google-Thread: 10ce2c,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gid10ce2c,public X-Google-Thread: 1016a2,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gid1016a2,public X-Google-Thread: f9acd,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gidf9acd,public X-Google-Thread: fbf1a,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gidfbf1a,public X-Google-Thread: 104613,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gid104613,public X-Google-Thread: 10bfc7,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gid10bfc7,public X-Google-Thread: 16daed,3c3947f8ca72b2a8,start X-Google-Attributes: gid16daed,public From: varange@crl.com (Troy Varange) Subject: Regaining Self-Control Date: 1996/12/27 Message-ID: <Love@295701> X-Deja-AN: 206291297 here: Fri Dec 27 14:27:49 PST 1996 organization: Moderator of soc.culture.europe reply-to: varange@crl.com newsgroups: control,alt.flame,harvard.general,su.etc,alt.fan.karl-malden.nose,aus.flame,alt.bigfoot,alt.religion.scientology,alt.evil,alt.tv.simpsons,alt.tv.beavis-n-butthead,alt.tv.barney