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                                        The Mad Cows of Britain 

               Mad Cow Disease has become Britain's biggest problem
               since the second world war. You laugh, but wait. It has
               now been confirmed that the virus in question is not a
               regular virus at all. It is in fact a virus that makes the AIDS
               virus look like child's play. 

               It apparently has a frightening resistance level, surpassing
               that of the AIDS virus. First of all it has an incubation
               period of about 15-20 years. A lot of meat can be eaten in
               that time. Also surprising is the fact that the virus
               originates from Britain's sheep, not its cows.
               The reason why this is a catastrophe of monstrous proportions 
               is not just because all livestock on the island will have to be 

               culled, no that's the easy part. 
               The problem is that infected manure from
               the livestock has been dragged into the homes, backyards,
               towns and cities. This virus is now so widely distributed
               that the task of ridding the island of the virus may require
               more manpower than the British Isles can muster. 

               Other viruses, for example the AIDS virus, will die when
               boiled in water for 20 minutes. The new virus outlasts a
               FULL HOUR in boiling water. What this all means in the
               end is that practically every square foot of soil, including
               British homes will have to be decontaminated. In other
               words the soil has to be removed and treated (boiled)
               extensively before it will be rid of any trace of the virus.
               The Germans, entrepreneurial as always are already
               developing industrial sized "soil boilers", bringing back
               fond memories of their "scorched earth" concept in the late
               thirties. These huge machines will literally pick up 25 tons
               of earth per batch for high pressure hot water processing.
               Sizes to accommodate all levels of British strata are
               presently being designed and are due out in late Spring. 

               It is not difficult to imagine what that entails for Britain's
               agricultural industry, never mind meat or dairy
               products.The catch is that British beef has been traded
               internationally in Europe and North America legally for
               years and as of late illegally by unscrupulous British beef
               dealers for cold hard cash. 

               Looks like the Brits are in for a Spring cleaning, in a big
               way. It might be interesting to add as a footnote that
               because domestic animals raised for consumption are
               pumped to the rim with anti-biotics and other toxic
               medications, it has produced anti-biotic resistant viruses
               that will be among us from here on in. Perhaps, it is
               nature's "final solution". 


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Shock Media April 1996 Issue