🚀 go-pugleaf

There seem to be an impossible number of dumbshits on the
Mt. Vernon trail.

DumbShits:

1. "Chicken Walkers"  People who walk on the wrong side and
   don't give way when they see a bike tearing down at them.
2. The Tripwire.  Stupid dog owners who walk on the right,
   and let their LEASHED dog walk on the left.
3. Parents of clumsy kids who don't make sure their brat is
   on the right side of the trail.
4. "The Blockade" - a group of people walking side by side,
   blocking all attempts to pass.  Usually teenagers who ought
   to know better.
5. The Stop-And-Get-Killed lemmings who are walking at a brisk
   pace and then stop because they just noticed an interesting
   piece of dirt on the ground.  They will often stop abruptly
   and lurch to their left, risking your and their life in the
   act of passing.
6. Roller-Trip-Bladers.  These dumbshits like to rollerblade side
   by side, not realizing that they kick their feet out 2 feet
   into the oncoming lane, making passing them a fun "trip".
7. Fat people on their new bike.  I think it's great that these
   butterballs are trying to lose weight and get healthy.  But not
   when they wobble unpredictably and lurch left and right like
   the a spinning top.  Fortunately there are relatively few of
   these.
8. Lover's Lane- yes, it's very romantic to stop on the wooden
   bridges and kiss your lovie-dovie.  It's almost as romantic
   as when I end up in a bloody pile of bike parts and torn
   ligaments with your lover.  Very romantic.  Especially when
   it's two big fatasses that fill more than a single lane.
9. Ansel Adams wannabes.  These types are usually found standing
   in the CENTER of the trail, just around a sharp bend, blocked
   by trees, holding their brand-new Canon up to their faces,
   oblivious to anything except the oh-so-interesting piece of
   dog doo they are snapping a picture of.

Great People:

1. Heading south on Mt. Vernon trail, about 1/5 mile from the
   end of the trail (yes, the steep "last mile climb") when
   someone coming in the opposite direction shouts out "almost
   there!" in encouragement.  I like that!
2. Walkers who see a "three-walkers-in-a-line" preventing me
   from passing, when they step off the path to let me through.
   These people are great!
3. Parents who keep both their kids and their dogs on a short
   short leash.

As you can see, there are at least 9 types of dumbshits and 3 types
of "Great People."

Has anyone collected a list of types of trail-dumbshits and their
typical behavior patterns?  This could be a great resource for those
willing to brave the crowds on the trails in the dc area.

P.S. Is there a list on the web that has information about the trails
(paved for roadies and unpaved for mtn bikers) in the northern VA
area?  My searching has been in vain so far.