🚀 go-pugleaf

Amen brother, but you forgot the "jump left when you say 'on your left'"
morons and the wonderful folks that *thank* you for warning them as you
pass. ;^)

Mt. Vernon on a nice day is almost as bad as riding around the monuments
when the cherry blossoms were in bloom (and you can bet I won't do that
again.) You just don't know the frustration of the tourist syndrome
unless you've seen it from your saddle.

The worst place for me along the trail is right at the end of the runway
at Gravelly Point.  Some folks just don't know how to handle themselves
down there. Got hit once by some guy who lost control of his bike and
crossed onto the right side of the trail. His front wheel bounced off my
calf and he took the endo. Hopefully learned something from it. On
another occasion, I found one kid sitting *in the middle of the trail*
just begging to be tripped over.

If anybody knows any Eagle Scout candidates that need a worthwhile
service project, installing a few benches (to keep the pooped
uncoordinated rollerbladers from taking a breather in the middle of the
trail) would make him a local hero. =)

Cheers,
RDeC

XYZ wrote:

> There seem to be an impossible number of dumbshits on the
> Mt. Vernon trail.
>
> DumbShits:
>
> 1. "Chicken Walkers"  People who walk on the wrong side and
>    don't give way when they see a bike tearing down at them.
> 2. The Tripwire.  Stupid dog owners who walk on the right,
>    and let their LEASHED dog walk on the left.
> 3. Parents of clumsy kids who don't make sure their brat is
>    on the right side of the trail.
> 4. "The Blockade" - a group of people walking side by side,
>    blocking all attempts to pass.  Usually teenagers who ought
>    to know better.
> 5. The Stop-And-Get-Killed lemmings who are walking at a brisk
>    pace and then stop because they just noticed an interesting
>    piece of dirt on the ground.  They will often stop abruptly
>    and lurch to their left, risking your and their life in the
>    act of passing.
> 6. Roller-Trip-Bladers.  These dumbshits like to rollerblade side
>    by side, not realizing that they kick their feet out 2 feet
>    into the oncoming lane, making passing them a fun "trip".
> 7. Fat people on their new bike.  I think it's great that these
>    butterballs are trying to lose weight and get healthy.  But not
>    when they wobble unpredictably and lurch left and right like
>    the a spinning top.  Fortunately there are relatively few of
>    these.
> 8. Lover's Lane- yes, it's very romantic to stop on the wooden
>    bridges and kiss your lovie-dovie.  It's almost as romantic
>    as when I end up in a bloody pile of bike parts and torn
>    ligaments with your lover.  Very romantic.  Especially when
>    it's two big fatasses that fill more than a single lane.
> 9. Ansel Adams wannabes.  These types are usually found standing
>    in the CENTER of the trail, just around a sharp bend, blocked
>    by trees, holding their brand-new Canon up to their faces,
>    oblivious to anything except the oh-so-interesting piece of
>    dog doo they are snapping a picture of.
>
> Great People:
>
> 1. Heading south on Mt. Vernon trail, about 1/5 mile from the
>    end of the trail (yes, the steep "last mile climb") when
>    someone coming in the opposite direction shouts out "almost
>    there!" in encouragement.  I like that!
> 2. Walkers who see a "three-walkers-in-a-line" preventing me
>    from passing, when they step off the path to let me through.
>    These people are great!
> 3. Parents who keep both their kids and their dogs on a short
>    short leash.
>
> As you can see, there are at least 9 types of dumbshits and 3 types
> of "Great People."
>
> Has anyone collected a list of types of trail-dumbshits and their
> typical behavior patterns?  This could be a great resource for those
> willing to brave the crowds on the trails in the dc area.
>
> P.S. Is there a list on the web that has information about the trails
> (paved for roadies and unpaved for mtn bikers) in the northern VA
> area?  My searching has been in vain so far.