🚀 go-pugleaf

Found this on another news group.  Sounds like things are more or less
the same the world over.

>10 new rules of the road for South African Drivers

> ARTICLE I
> The assumption of immortality is required of all road users.
>
> ARTICLE II
> The following precedence must be accorded at all times. In descending
> order, give way to: elephants, Taxis, heavy trucks, buses, official
> cars, Taxis, light trucks, Taxis, buffalo, Jeeps, ox-carts, Taxis,
> private cars, motorcycles, scooters, goats, bicycles (goods-carrying),
> handcarts, bicycles (passenger-carrying), dogs, pedestrians, Taxis.
>
> ARTICLE III
> All wheeled vehicles shall be driven in accordance with the maxim: to
> slow is to falter, to brake is to fail, to stop is defeat. This is the
> South African drivers' mantra.
>
> ARTICLE IV
> Use of horn (also known as the sonic fender or aural amulet):
> Cars(IV,1,a-c): Short blasts (urgent) indicate supremacy, ie in
> clearing  dogs and pedestrians from path. Long blasts (desperate)
>denotes
>supplication, ie to oncoming truck, "I am going too fast to stop,  so
>unless
>you slow down we shall both die". In extreme cases this may  be
>accompanied
>by flashing of headlights (frantic). Single blast (casual)
> means "I have seen someone out of South Africas 46 million whom I
> recognize", "There is a bird in the road (which at this speed could go
> through my windscreen)" or "I have not blown my horn for several
> minutes."
> Trucks and buses (IV,2,a): All horn signals have the same meaning,
> viz, "I have an all-up weight of approximately 12.5 tons and have no
> intention of stopping, even if I could." This signal may be emphasized
> by the use of headlamps (insouciant). Article IV remains subject to
> the provision of Order of Precedence in Article II above.
>
> ARTICLE V
> All manoeuvres, use of horn and evasive action shall be left until the
> last possible moment.
>
> ARTICLE VI
> In the absence of seat belts (which there is), car occupants shall
> wear Cellular phones strapped to their ears. These should be kept
>fastened
>at all times.
>
> ARTICLE VII
> Rights of way: Traffic entering a road from the left has priority.So
> has  traffic from the right, and also traffic in the middle. Lane
> discipline
> (VII,1): All traffic at all times and irrespective of direction of
> travel shall occupy the centre of the road.
>
> ARTICLE VIII
> Roundabouts: South Africa has no roundabouts. Apparent traffic islands
> in the middle of crossroads have no traffic management function. Any
> other impression should be ignored.
>
> ARTICLE IX
> Overtaking is mandatory. Every moving vehicle is required to overtake
> every other moving vehicle, irrespective of whether it has just
> overtaken you. Overtaking should only be undertaken in suitable
> conditions, such as in the face of oncoming traffic, on blind bends,
> at junctions and in the middle of villages/city centres. No more than two
> inches should be allowed between your vehicle and the one you are
> passing - and one inch in the case of bicycles or pedestrians.
>
> ARTICLE X
> Nirvana may be obtained through the head-on crash.
>
>

grandma Rosalie