🚀 go-pugleaf

X25 News wrote:
> 
> It is possible that God created the universe to look like it had been there
> a longer time....but i also feel strongly towards the "long creation days"

> >> Wrong. Many believe in "long creation days" where the 6 days of creation
> >> do NOT equal 6 24-hour periods. There are passages in the Bible to support
> >> this theory.

Well, duh!

"In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

"And the earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the
face of the deep.  And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the
waters.

"And God said, 'Get me a lighter, I need a smoke!'"

No, no.  "And God said, "Let there be light; and there was light.

"And God saw the light, that it was good because he could use it to
smoke cigarettes."

No, shut up, darn it!  "And God saw the light, that it was good: and God
divided the light from the darkness.

"And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the
evening and the morning were the first day."

Okay, so he created the heaven and the earth before the end of the first
"day."

But he doesn't get around to creating the Sun and the Moon and the stars
until the fourth day!

So how do you arbitrarily assign 24 hours to any of these days?  There
was no Sun, no Moon, and no stars until  days after God created the
heaven and the earth.  How do you tell time without a Sun, Moon, or
stars?  How long is a day without a Sun?  ("A day without sunshine is
like...night!" -- Steve Martin)

By the time God gets around to making the Sun, he's already made the
firmament to divide the waters, calling it Heaven, made the dry land
appear and called it Earth, had the Earth bring forth grass, herb
yielding seed (marijuana?) and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his
kind.

Now there's a dickens.  How did the grass grow and the fruit tree yield
fruit without the Sun in the sky?  Oh, well, there was light.  God saw
the light and had a smoke and said it was good.  So, the light helped
the grass and fruit trees grow, but the Sun came later so we could tell
time.

Because this light with no Sun business was very disturbing, God gets
around to creating the fish and fowl and whales and such after he has
the Sun and the Moon and the stars positioned properly.  Wouldn't want
any of the circadian rhythms of these beasties getting all screwed up by
that light without any Sun.  Otherwise they would have trouble being
fruitful and multiplying.  (God made the trees before he made the
beasts, because the adders needed to find a log in order to multiply.)

So, then, after five of these days, he gets around to making people (in
his own image, with belly buttons) on the sixth day and is so wiped out
he takes the next day off.  But not before he gets around to telling Man
that he has been given every herb bearing seed, clearly an admonition to
smoke as much pot as Man wants.

Now, keep in mind that this extra long days of creation business cuts
two ways.  If God got extra long days (say, 2 billion years at a throw)
to create the universe, and rested on the seventh day, isn't that
seventh day also extra long?  Doesn't that suggest that God has been
resting ever since he created people? So he has what, another
1,999,900,000 years to rest (given the rough date of homo sapiens
appearance in the fossil record or maybe only 1,994,000,000 years if we
take the earliest appearance of hominids).

Thus the Deist concept of a God who created the universe and retired. 
"You kids take care of it.  And no rough-housing in the living room!"

Free Yourself,

Jim
http://www.alf.net/mayors.html