🚀 go-pugleaf

El chiste del Bill es buenisimo. Yo lo tenia en Ingles.
Ahora voy a poner uno ( en ingles ) que me paso hace tiempo Alberto
Pitarch, de la uji ( Saludetes ) sobre Star Trek y el Windoze 
( es buenisimo )



> >"Star Trek Lost Episodes" Transcript
> 
> >(Picard) "Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a
> >weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their
> >command pathways?" 
> 
> >(Geordi)"Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer by searching through our
> >archives on late Twentieth-century computing technology." 
> 
> >(Geordi presses a key, and a logo appears on the computer screen.) 
> 
> >(Riker looks puzzled.) "What the hell is 'Microsoft'?" 
> 
> >(Data turns to answer.) "Allow me to explain. We will send this program, for
> >some reason called 'Windows', through the Borg command pathways. Once
> >inside their root command unit, it will begin consuming system resources at an
> >unstoppable rate." 
> 
> >(Picard) "But the Borg have the ability to adapt. Won't they alter their
> >processing systems to increase their storage capacity?" 
> 
> >(Data) "Yes, Captain. But when 'Windows' detects this, it creates a new version
> >of itself known as an 'upgrade'. The use of resources increases exponentially
> >with each iteration. The Borg will not be able to adapt quickly enough.
> >Eventually all of their processing ability will be taken over and none will be
> >available for their normal operational functions." 
> 
> >(Picard) "Excellent work. This is even better than that 'unsolvable geometric
> >shape' idea." 
> 
> >(Data) "Captain, We have successfully installed the 'Windows' in the command
> >unit and as expected it immediately consumed 85% of all resources. We however
> >have not received any confirmation of the expected 'upgrade'." 
> 
> >(Geordi) "Our scanners have picked up an increase in Borg storage and CPU
> >capacity to compensate, but we still have no indication of an 'upgrade' to
> >compensate for their increase." 
> 
> >(Picard) "Data, scan the history banks again and determine if their is something
> >we have missed." 
> 
> >(Data) "Sir, I believe their is a reason for the failure in the 'upgrade'.
> >Apparently the Borg have circumvented that part of the plan by not sending in
> >their registration cards. 
> 
> >(Riker) "Captain we have no choice. Requesting permission to begin emergency
> >escape sequence 3F . . ." 
> 
> >(Geordi, excited) "Wait, Captain I just detected their CPU capacity has suddenly
> >dropped to 0% !" 
> 
> >(Picard) "Data, what does your scanners show?" 
> 
> >(Data) "Apparently the Borg have found the internal 'Windows' module named
> >'Solitaire' and it has used up all the CPU capacity." 
> 
> >(Picard) "Lets wait and see how long this 'solitaire' can reduce their
> >functionality." 
> 
> >(Riker) "Geordi what's the status on the Borg?" 
> 
> >(Geordi) "As expected the Borg are attempting to re-engineer to compensate for
> >increased CPU and storage demands, but each time they successfully increase
> >resources I have setup our closest deep space monitor beacon to transmit more
> >'windows' modules from something called the 'Microsoft fun-pack'. 
> 
> >(Picard) "How much time will that buy us ?" 
> 
> >(Data) "Current Borg solution rates allow me to predicate an interest time span
> >of 6 more hours." 
> 
> >(Geordi) "Captain, another vessel has entered our sector." 
> 
> >(Picard) "Identify." 
> 
> >(Data) "It appears to have markings very similar to the 'Microsoft' logo" 
> 
> >(Over the speakers) "THIS IS ADMIRAL BILL GATES OF THE MICROSOFT FLAGSHIP
> >MONOPOLY. WE HAVE POSITIVE CONFIRMATION OF UNREGISTERED SOFTWARE IN THIS SECTOR.
> >SURRENDER ALL ASSETS AND WE CAN AVOID ANY TROUBLE. YOU HAVE 10 SECONDS" 
> 
> >(Data) "The alien ship has just opened its forward hatches and released
> >thousands of humanoid shaped objects." 
> 
> >(Picard) "Magnify forward viewer on the alien craft" 
> 
> >(Riker) "Good God captain! Those are humans floating straight toward the Borg
> >ship with no life support suits ! How can they survive the tortures of deep
> >space ?!" 
> 
> >(Data) "I don't believe that those are humans sir, if you will look closer I
> >believe you will see that they are carrying something recognized by twenty-first
> >century man as doe skin leather briefcases, and wearing Armani suits" 
> 
> >(Riker and Picard together horrified) "Lawyers !!" 
> 
> >(Geordi) "It can't be. All the Lawyers were rounded up and sent hurtling into
> >the sun in 2017 during the Great Awakening." 
> 
> >(Data) "True, but apparently some must have survived." 
> 
> >(Riker) "They have surrounded the Borg ship and are covering it with all types
> >of papers." 
> 
> >(Data) "I believe that is known in ancient vernacular as 'red tape' - it often
> >proves fatal." 
> 
> >(Riker) "They're tearing the Borg to pieces!" 
> 
> >(Picard) "Turn off the monitors. I can't stand to watch, not even the Borg
> >deserve that." 
> 
> 
> 


-- 


           DyWea/AnYmA+SciZZo Requiem est AmIgA !
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