🚀 go-pugleaf

In article <DrBsHI.Gz3@world.std.com>, Robert Becker <robertb@world.std.com> wrote:
>rec.org.mensa trimmed out - what the hell was that doing there?
>
>In article <DrBL7p.BKt@world.std.com>,
>John Cooley <jcooley@world.std.com> wrote:
>>I have an aquaintance (more like a friend of a friend) who I've known for
>>the past three years whose name I'll say is "Barb".  Barb has been going out
>>with Ben for over 9 years and desperately wants to marry him.  He said no
>>because of a mix of reasons plus the fact he wanted her to lose some weight.
>>Barb was kind of bullshit about the whole thing so started to try dating
>>other men.  She has a fairly good job, her own condo, but she was 5'6"
>>and wore size 22 clothes.  She couldn't get any guys to date her.  Over
>>about 6 months she lost about 30 lbs and plateaued at size 18.  For the 
>>past 1 1/2 years she's been doing everything to get a steady
>>boyfriend -- stuff like paying big bucks to answer personal ads and
>>joining dating services.  And every weekend the friend of a friend tells
>>me how poor Barb had a great date with some new guy -- but they *never*
>>call her back for a second date.  Barb's even joined one of those pricey
>>dating services where it worked out to $120.00 per date -- and she still
>>can't get a second date!
>
>Wrong again, sir.  I married someone that size.  We are no longer
>married, but her size has nothing to do with the divorce.  There are
>lots of men who like big women.  I happen to know two, besides myself,
>who either dated for a respectable period of time or married big
>women.  You just don't happen to know any.

NOT wrong again.  He even stated he was grossly oversimplifying things
(something you snipped) which means it doesn't apply to ALL men and women,
that looks is what draws a man's attention.  The situation does exist where
men will reject women for looks; it is not a denial of all other
possibilities.  How to deal with that situation is indeed a very important
issue.


>I do not know how your aquaintance is approaching the dating aspect of
>her life.  And since you don't know her very well at all, her being a
>friend of a friend, you aren't qualified to say that it's merely her
>size that makes the difference.  Now, if you had personal knowledge of
>how she talks with people, what her personality is, you might not say
>what you did above.

Then again he might still.  These people and situations do exist - yours is
not the only reality, nor is his.


>Frankly, I find your comments amazing because you assume so much.  You
>would be well advised to speak from personal experience only.

That was what he was doing.  Learn to read.


>Lastly, I think you're posting outrageous remarks like the above
>merely to start a topic.

The outrage was in what YOU depicted of his remarks.  The topic is quite
valid, as is your point about how you (and, assuming many men who you know)
treat women.  But there is a chance that she may not be among men as
enlightened as you, and as such it is a valid point to discuss what their
mental outlook is, and how to deal with it.

You have no idea if it's their attitude, or hers, that's causing her
problems.  But he has a right to start a topic and at least HOPE that he
can learn some advice to help him discern which; or to start a topic and
fuck it up, or do something in between.  People say outrageous shit around
here all the time to start topics.


-- Steve