🚀 go-pugleaf

John Cooley (jcooley@world.std.com) writes:
|   Matt Austern <austern@mti.sgi.com> wrote:
|   >Who would you expect to respond to such a question in a newspaper
|   >column: people who are happy with their choices, or people who are
|   >unhappy?  
|   
|   I know it wasn't a scientific poll & all, but I felt it was rather surprizing.

Stop right there - you said something important but apparently didn't
realize it.  This wasn't a scientific poll.  It tells us nothing about
the attitudes of those who didn't respond to the poll.  So it
shouldn't surprise you, really.  70% of people who heard about a
"poll" in an advice column and took the time to respond were unhappy
about their choice to have children.  But who would have bothered to
take the time to write a letter in response to that poll?  It's at
least plausible that people who wanted to complain about their lives
would be more likely to answer, because it gave them the feeling that
someone was "listening".

|   Judging from all the letters I've read in her column over the years, Ann
|   Landers tends to get more response from middle aged woman more than any
|   other group.  (You know: hubby's a drunk & needs help, etc.)  And, over
|   the years, I've more than once got to hear from more than one parent about
|   how their kids were the best thing that ever happened to them, again, and
|   again, and again, and again.  That's why I was surprized to see this 70%
|   figure.  Then I realized that it could be that most parents would never want
|   to admit publically that they wished they hadn't have had kids.  It sort
|   of reflects poorly on them and is bound to draw some suspicious looks...

Or maybe _most_ parents really are happy that they had children.  But
those who are not were much more likely to respond to this "poll".

If parenthood really were so miserable, every child would be an only
child.

- Cindy Kandolf, certified language mechanic, mamma flodnak
 cindy@nvg.unit.no                      Trondheim, Norway
 My home page, with link to the Bilingual Families Web page:
        http://www.nvg.unit.no/~cindy/