🚀 go-pugleaf

<  have been married or taken for the last 10yrs. I find all of the
mental gymnastics tedious at best. The amount of money single guys
spend to avoid (or try to avoid) the void of not having a partner
amazes me (guilty). >

I've been known to do that. I started to analyze myself why am I doing it as an originally very romance-loving 
faithful and sincere guy. Guess what? I figured it out.
The _only_ thing that kept repulsing me from a loving, faithful monogamous partnership... is monogamy. A 
self-imposed giving up of freedom.

Why? Am I some kind of pervert? 
Not at all. If I can believe the book I'm reading (History of Sex, published in 1953 in London) monogamy was 
imposed upon the people only around Middle-Age by the Christian Church which labeled everything "sinful" 
that could possibly draw people away from religious zeal. Before the Church started to exterminate most any  
"sinful" pleasure from peorple's lives with their prohibitions, it was quite frequent and acceptable to have 4 -5 
wives or husbands in Europe. It was a happy world, and no one made much fuss about a roll in the hay.

I imagined myself finding a woman who would be able to live in a such free-love, equal ground relationship 
with me. (A swinger, by todays description.) The very moment I imagined a such person, a passionate love 
and feelings of happyness and belonging took me over like wildfire exploding. Whoa! I was amazed of what 
erupted in me in just a few seconds. There is no problem with lack of emotions, or commitment, here! It's only 
this brain-dead monogamy crap that kept me subconsciously away. The moment I understood that a lifelong 
commitment to one person and sexual pleasure while understandably related, do not overlap each other 
100% at all, I knew what I need to do.

I contacted the local swinger's club, and signed up for all programs. I put out ads in their local mag, and I 
look forward to do the same on a national level. I know now that if I am to find Miss Right (-for-me) I will find 
her somewhere in the swinger's world.  It will be someone in who the notions of pleasure and wrongness have 
_NO_ (zero, nada, zilch, zippo) connection.

Wish I figured this out earlier.  :-)  Oh well, better late than never.

George