🚀 go-pugleaf

You have my support Diana, Sad that people get off on being a**holes...more
annoying than anything.

Jen

"Diana" <noreturnmail@Ilearnedmylesson.com> wrote in message
news:hjIq7.10010$6q.402617@typhoon.neo.rr.com...
> One more and it is ISP up's for you. I won't allow you to do this in this
> group without writing everyone I can to get you out.
> Diana
> "Ken" <krp@atlantic.net> wrote in message
> news:JAUB9DJN37155.3848726852@anonymous.poster...
> > Just kidding.  Seriously, though, here are some JOKES to lighten the
mood,
> > brought to you by the American Society of Trial COnsultants
> > (www.astcweb.org):
> >
> > What does WTC stand for? -  "What Trade Center?"
> >
> > Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
> > A: New Yorkers. Some of them go through 110 stories in 5 seconds
> >
> > Q: Why do tourists flock to New York?
> > A: It's a blast
> >
> > The FBI has just identified the man who trained the hijackers: Dale
> > Earnhardt.
> >
> > At the World Trade Center restaurant, they offered three seating areas:
> > smoking, non-smoking and burned beyond recognition.
> >
> > They dont need any more volunteers to help at the WTC: they have found
> 5000
> > extra pairs of hands...
> >
> > New York, New York, so good they hit it twice
> >
> > American Airlines is now offering sight seeing tours of Manhattan!
> >
> > Q: What is world most efficient airline?
> > A: American Airlines, leave Boston 8:15...be in your office in New York
> > 8:48!
> >
> > What was the last thing going through Mr. Jones head sitting in 90th
floor
> > of the WTC ? - The 91st floor.....
> >
> > What was the last thing going through Mr. Smiths head sitting in 110th
> > floor
> > of the WTC ? - The radio mast...
> >
> > America's new math:
> > Q: Now how many sides to a Pentagon?
> > A: 4
> >
> > If one side of the Pentagon has collapsed, will it now be renamed "The
> > Square"?
> >
> > It should be renamed "The Penta-gone"
> >
> > It should be renamed "Manflatten"
> >
> > Famous last words: "Amal, was this tower here yesterday?"
> >
> > American Airline's pilot announcement:
> > "Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be landing on New York in about 10
> > minutes....."
> >
> > Well, this proves one thing.... New Yorkers really come together in a
> > crunch
> >
> > Today FBI concluded that New York had been hit by a U.F.M
> > (unidentified flying muslim)
> >
> > Q: What did one terrorist say to the other terrorist before boarding
their
> > respective airplanes?
> > A: I slam, you slam, we all slam for Islam!
> >
> > NEWSFLASH.... The WTC has been destroyed.... thousands of New York
> > executives feared dead.... Hookers all across the city are in
> mourning.....
> >
> > "25,000 sq. ft. Office space for rent.  Recently renovated.  New Air
> > Conditioning unit.  Needs TLC.  Contact me at One World Trade Centre.
85th
> > Floor, Room 18."
> >
> > "It's a bird!"
> > "It's a plane!"
> > "It's.... Oh fuck, it IS a plane!"
> >
> > Q: Why didn't Superman stop the planes from hitting the Trade Towers?
> > A: Because he's a quadriplegic!
> >
> > Q: What do you call a dust storm?
> > A: Trade winds.
> >
> > Q: What's the area code of the World Trade Center?
> > A: 220 (two to zero).
> >
> > Q: What should have tipped off the ticket sellers?
> > A: When the terrorists asked if there was anything cheaper than one-way.
> >
> > Q: What was the quickest escape time from the World Trade Center?
> > A: Ten seconds flat.
> >
> > Q: How long does it take to reach the ground from 107 stories up?
> > A: The rest of your life
> >
> > Q: Why are police and firemen New York's finest?
> > A: Because now you can run them through a sieve.
> >
> > Optimism,  as you fall past the 20th floor you shout "I'm not hurt yet"
> >
> > How many New Yorkers does it take to change a light bulb?
> > God knows, they keep jumping out the window when it gets too hot
> >
> > What's the number one drink served on United Airlines?
> > Flaming Manhattan
> >
> > What music do they play in the elevator in the WTC?
> > Jump and It's Raining Men
> >
> > Floor 106...... you ARE the weakest link.... goodbye....
> >
> > What color were the pilots eyes?
> > Blue. One blew this way the other blew that way
> >
> > What team does a United Airlines pilot support?
> > The New York Jets
> >
> > Where do Americans go on vacation?
> > All over Manhattan
> >
> > How many Americans died in the WTC yesterday?
> > Who gives a fuck
> >
> > What's the difference between Wembley and New York?
> > Wembley's still got their twin towers.
> >
> > What's the difference between the attack on New York and the Oklahoma
City
> > Bombing? - Again foreigners prove they can do it better and more
> > efficiently......
> >
> > Then there's the retarded terrorist who tried to crash the A-Train into
> the
> > World Trade Center..........
> >
> > Yassar Arraffat and many other PLO members together with people from
other
> > Muslim nations are *Volunteering* to give blood for the victims of the
> > tragedy... I guess they'll have some *Volunteers* to Fly the blood in
too!
> >
> > Last words from Airline pilot  "Right a bit, hey the trade centre, my
> > brother works there...lets look just a bit closer...."
> >
> > The FBI have arrested the head of advertising at the Empire State
Building
> > for involvement in the WTC disaster. A spokesman said he was caught with
> > 'Empire State: We're Back!!!'  T-shirts in his office...
> >
> >
> > Top 10 Good Things About The WTC Attack
> >
> > 10. There are now 18 fewer Arab taxi drivers terrorizing the streets.
> >  9. Flight training schools proved that they are expensive but worth it.
> >  8. People are learning how to spell "Afghanistan" correctly.
> >  7. Plenty of parking available at airports now.
> >  6. Jerry Springer Show was off the air for a whole week.
> >  5. Sales for U.S. flags are way up.
> >  4. Several new job openings now at NYPD and NYFD.
> >  3. Much lower electric bills for Manhattan.
> >  2. Home videos of the WTC attack more spectacular than Arnold
> > Schwarzenegger's last 5 movies.
> > And the number one ...
> >  1. Some great new unobstructed views of Manhattan now.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
>