🚀 go-pugleaf

The O.J. trial as told by Dr Suess


I did not kill my lovely wife
I did not slash her with her knife
I did not bonk her on the head
I did not know she was dead

I stayed at home that fateful night
I took a cab, then took a flight
The bag I had was just for me
My bag! My bag! Leave it be!

When I came home I had a gash
My hand was gashed from broken glass
I cut my hand upon a glass
A broken glass did cause that gash

My friend, he took me for a ride
All through L.A., from side to side
From North to South, we took a ride
But from the cops, I could not hide

And now we've been here for a year
A year! A year! Just sitting here!
The DNA, the hem and haw
The circus-hype the viewers saw
A year! A year! Just sitting here!
And lawyers charge by the hour, I fear

If I'm found "Guilty", I'll appeal
Appeal! Appeal! I will appeal!
I'll wheedle and whine, I'll cut a deal!
If it's "Not Guilty", so glad I'll feel

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And this little ditty suggested by O.J.'s statement to Judge Ito
that he could not, would not, Kill Nicole and Ron. Ito's lines are in
capital letters:
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DID YOU DO THIS AWFUL CRIME?
DID YOU DO IT ANYTIME?

I did not do this awful crime,
I could not, would not, anytime

DID YOU TAKE THIS PERSON'S LIFE?
DID YOU DO IT WITH A KNIFE?

I did not do it with a knife
I did not, could not, kill my wife
I did not do this awful crime
I could not, would not, anytime

DID YOU LEAVE A POOL OF BLOOD?
DID YOU DROP THIS BLOODY GLOVE?

I did not leave a pool of blood
I can not even wear that glove
I did not do it with a knife
I did not, could not, kill my wife
I did not do this awful crime
I could not, would not, anytime

I did not do it, so I say
It's not my blood or DNA