🚀 go-pugleaf

John Cooley wrote:
> 
> Stuart A. Bronstein <adam@crl.com> wrote:
> >If I get too many turn-downs (two in a row or three out of five
> >invitations), I won't ask her out again.  (Unless she has a damn
> >good reason and in other ways shows that she is very interested.)
> >
> >If I feel someone has to be convinced that I am worth her time, it's not
> >worth my time.
> 
> Stu, usually if I get turned down twice, I'm gone.  I especially thought
> the "rule" about a women never to accept a Saturday day that wasn't made
> before Wednesday to be a real killer, too.  Most of my life I've been
> pretty spontaneous -- which means the dates are usually made the day
> before most of the time.  The other "rule" about her needing to be
> showered with pricey & romantic gifts or the relationship is off just
> strikes me as purely appealing to the "gold-digger" mentality.  (Actually,
> it's a good test to see if she really likes you for you or you for your
> money by *not* giving lots of or pricey gifts.)
> 
>   - John

If you can't plan out at least a little bit, you are probably not going
to get a lot of dates. If there is one thing we women hate is someone
who constantly calls at the last minute. Our lives are pretty busy so if
you do always wait until the last minute, chances are we are already
busy.

Case in point, a guy who is a friend of mine (and just a friend)
generally waits until the last moment to call me to see what I'm doing
for the weekend. On Saturday he did this and missed a party at a mutal
friend's house. A couple of weeks ago he missed another party (we had
gone out the night before and when we went our seperate ways he forgot
to ask "what's going on tomorrow night?"). 

90% of the time we do something together it's because I've called him 
ahead of time to see if he wanted to join us. But I'm not going to be
his full-time social director or have him tag along all the time. (I had
mentioned that Friday I had a girls' night out and we went to this and
that place. He said, "You should have invited me." I told him that it
defeated the purpose of having a girls' night out when a guy tags
along).

I have not read the book and I try not to play games. But from what I've
heard about it, the basic premise is correct: Have your own life and
don't wait around for him. It's hard I think for men to deal with a
woman who is pretty dependent on him. And it's hard on the relationship
and even the woman. In the end, you need to have your own life and not
settle for anything less than you expect.

Dara