🚀 go-pugleaf

CHARLIE BARTA (orlando4@ix.netcom.com) wrote:
: In <45tl3i$792@news.iadfw.net> "Scott C. McKissack"
: >I agree, we tend to always be attracted to the same types, I suppose
: >we could make a consious effort to change that trait, however it is
: >difficult since it is so much easier to find the people you are
: >naturally attrcted to, whether they are good for you or not.

: I feel most people (myself sometimes included), play head games during
: the infatuation period of a relationship. It's like the peacock, we
: want to show off our bright side. Once the plumage falls off and face
: one another's true nature we may have dug such a deep hole (lies),
: about ourselves that the only way out is to lie some more or brake it
: off. If we were honest during the early stages, we might feel
: inadequate and not pursue our desire to build a relationship. Know what
: I mean?
:                     CB

Uhhhhh...no, I don't know what you mean.  I don't think that
telling outright lies is understandable.

It is perfectly understandable (to me, at least) for someone to
present their best side during the early stages of a relationship.
Certain subjects may be avoided, or glossed over as part of this
process.  If someone told me all of her dark secrets the first time
I met her, I'd wonder what *else* was wrong.  But, once I get to
know the good things about someone, sometimes the dark secrets
aren't such a big deal.

Although, I do wonder how this opening line would work...

"Hi, I'm a serial killer, and I'm considering you as my next
victim.  Would you like to join me for a cup of coffee?"

I do not think it is understandable to tell outright
lies to your partner, especially during the early stages 
of a relationship.  Maybe this comes from some sort of
naive hope that I am not being told outright lies, but 
it is the way I feel. 

If you have insecurities, or feel inadequate, see a therapist,
or talk about it with friends, or start a newsgroup 
alt.support.relationship.insecurities (has that already
been done?), or whatever. 

Mike