🚀 go-pugleaf

>What if it doesn't work then what do I do.  And I am trying to be 
>serious.

You might try something small.  A female friend told me that she used to
like to go out for coffee with people rather than out to dinner.  It's much
more informal and much less is at stake so (hopefully) you can relax and be
yourself.  I tend to agree.  You can learn a fair amount about a person over
a cup of coffee or an ice cream cone--certainly enough to decide whether to
try for something more substantial later.  And there's something calming
about sitting at a table (particularly outdoors) watching the hustle and
bustle of people, rather than sitting in a dark, quiet restaurant where
there's little to do but stare at your date (I'm not dismissing that, I'm
just saying that it adds anxiety in first-dates). 

Something else--if it doesn't work, find another person to ask.  The problem
with the word "rejection" is that it's so strong.  If you ask a girl out and
she says no, she's not saying "I hate you, you disgust me."  She's just
declining the offer to go out.  She may have good reasons, she may have
stupid reasons, and it may be her loss.  But it isn't like she's cutting you
off at the knees.  If she were freezing to death, and you trudged through a 
blizzard with warm food and clothing, and she said, "go away.  I don't want
it," THAT'S REJECTION.  

This isn't answering your question (how do I minimize the chance of
rejection) but I don't think there is an answer.  It's like being a batter
in baseball--you can't get a hit every time.  Even Ted Williams only hit
safely 4 out of 10 times.  You can do certain things to try and make
yourself more attractive to the opposite sex, but there's no 100% guarantee. 
There's not even a 90% guarantee.  Sometimes you're going strike out. 
Sometimes you're going to fly out.  It may be your fault, and it may NOT be
your fault but you'll be out anyway.
 
The best thing you can do is learn how to deal with the strikeouts and not
let them upset you.  IMO, the worst idea in the world is that there is only
ONE true love out there for everyone, and if you miss her, you never find
another.  It's BS.  I've met a number of truly superlative women.  I don't
meet them often, and when I do they're usually married or interested in
other people.  But every time I do, I'm heartened by the fact that there's
more than one, and they're out there.  It's like (to change similes) finding
gems in a mound of rocks.  A lot of women are sandstone and worthless,
colorless rocks.  But there are sapphires, rubies, emeralds, and even some
diamonds in there (and the best part is, different people think different
rocks are diamonds).  This is the trick--there is more than one diamond in
the pile.  If you find a diamond and you can't keep it--THERE ARE STILL MORE
DIAMONDS in the pile.  You have to dig and sift and it's time consuming and
hard work and it's often frustrating.  If you believe there are more
diamonds, you'll be able to keep searching and (hopefully) you'll find you
can keep.  But if you believe that there is only one diamond and you lose it--
you're going to be miserable.  

Good luck.  I hope you get whatever or whomever it is you're looking for.

-- 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Ollinger - jaollnge@netcom.com - Seasons change with the scenery 
weaving time in tapestry; won't you stop and remember me? -- Simon/Garfunkle
The John Barry Resource: ftp://ftp.netcom.com/pub/ja/jaollnge/jbarry.htm
The Lynne Russell Resource: ftp://ftp.netcom.com/pub/ja/jaollnge/lynne.htm