🚀 go-pugleaf

In article <43lsru$44d@aadt.sdt.com> leb@sdt.com writes:
>fereira@isis.com (John Fereira) wrote:
>>Stop looking for "solutions" to the dating problem.
>>Just get out and meet people.
>
>I think that's a little easier said than done, in this age
>of possible psycopaths around every corner (real or imagined).

I never said it was easy.  Possible psychopaths around every corner?
Isn't that a bit paranoid?  

>You have to go to places that are "safe" (e.g. neutral ground) where
>such social encounters can take place, or are even encouraged,
>with the kinds of people you want to meet.
 
You can meet people anywhere.  Okay, so some of them are not going to
be "the kind of people you want to meet" (whatever that means).  Treating
someone differently because they don't happen to match some strict
criteria that describes "the kind of people you want to meet" is the kind
of socal behaviour that I, for one, find inattractive.  


>This may sound trite, but you might look in some of the following places:
 

>- professional societies, e.g. the Chamber of Commerce, the
>  IEEE/ACM, etc.  They abound; you just have to look for them.
>
>- The Dallas Museum of Art; the Kimball Museum (FW).
 
Fine if you live in Dallas I guess. (check the newsgroup line, this is a
global thread)

a bunch more "places" to meet people deleted.  While many of these places
may have potential partners the list implies that you are going to
these places with the intent of meeting the future love of your life.  What
I am advocating is that you can practice your social skills in every day
life and don't have to "look" for a place to go to in order to do it.  You
can talk to the cashier at the supermarket and not treat her as someone
as you describe as "if I only had a brain".  


>
>- UTA, UTD, UD, SMU, etc.
>
>I can hardly imagine a better place than a University graduate program
>to encounter people of my own age (or near so), who aren't the
>"if I only had a brain" types.  You'd be surprised at how many
>older (35+) people decide to "go back to school."
 
You'd be suprised at how many people that haven't gone back to school or
even possess an undergraduate degree that are every bit as intelligent
as someone you'd meet in graduate school.  

>If your're not the brainy type, then get involved!  The best way
>to meet someone that cares about the same things that you do, is
>do something about it.  Then you'll run into others that have the
>same commitment.  Is't meeting someone working toward a shared
>goal a good way to start?
>
>You *can* narrow the field by choosing the setting in which
>you want to meet the person; you'll at least have a *real* shared
>interest, rather than an imagined one.
 
Well, I *almost* agree with this.  Choosing an activity that you enjoy
is a good way to meet people but don't choose it because you want to
meet someone that might share the same interest.  Everyone seems to like
to take walks on the beach but that doesn't mean you're going to be 
romantically compatible with all of them.  Communicating with people
that share the same interests is easier but the goal that you're setting
seems to be to find the perfect mate rather then enjoy the activity and
possible meet someone while you're doing it.

The difference may be subtle but it is noticiable.

-- 
John Fereira
fereira@isis.com
Isis Distributed Systems - Ithaca, NY