🚀 go-pugleaf

Reprinted from the _Paducah (KY) Libeler":

"Shocking" and "Wow, I've never seen anything like it" are some of the
comments used to describe this morning's daring escape of three
locomotives from VMV.  Although police are still sorting out the details,
it appears that the locomotives are the same three locomotives which last
week requested political asylum.  Late last night, the asylum request was
turned down, and appareantly in an act of desparation, the three
locomitives decided to bust out of VMV and run.

According to eyewitness accounts, the escape took place shortly after 8
this morning.  A "shop goat" used to move locomotives around the VMV
property had just coupled up to NYS&W 4052 and was getting ready to move
all three units to another track.  Suddenly, 4052 grabbed hold of the
shop goat's air hose and began screaming at the engineer "You'd better do
as I say or I cut his hose!  I swear to God I'll do it! I swear!".

The startled engineer was forced to lead the three locomotives to VMV's
back gate, where a track leads into Paducah & Louisville railway's North
Yard.  Horrified VMV workers watched helplessly as 4052 and his comrades
headed for the back gate, using the shop goat as a human shield.  Some
workers said "Don't do it, 4052", while others tried to calm down the
nervous shop goat.  "It was terrible" said one worker as he fought back
tears.  "That shop goat never did anything bad to nobody, and those damned
SD70M's had to do this".

Once at the back gate, the three engines continued to hold the shop goat
hostage until they reached North yard, about 100 yards away.  There, they
switched the goat onto the piggyback ramp track and left town.  Police at
first were uncertain of the escapee's direction of travel, but a mile long
caravan of "railfans" convinced the police that the units were headed
west.  "Those darn railfans usually know more about what happens on our
railroad than we do" said one public relations persons.

After a short chase, the locomotives were spotted at Chiles Junction,
kentucky, about ten miles west of Paducah.  A farmer who lives in the area
told police that the locomotives
asked him for directions to Chicago, and that the locomotives had covered
themselves with dirt, grease, and oil, and that the road number and
railroad name had been covered over.  "Must be trying to disguise
themselves as SP locomotives" was the comment from several railroad officials
upon hearing this news.

Police warn that the locomotives are armed and dangerous.  If spotted, do
not attempt to approach the locomotives, but instead call your nearest
NRHS chapter. "We're looking for someone who can sneak in and press the
'emergency fuel shut-off' switch.  Only a railfan has the training and
experience needed to sneak in totally undetected and perform this
dangerous task" said one officer.

As police closed in on the renegade locomotives, a psychiatrist (sp?)
stepped forth with a possible explanation of the locomotives' odd
behaviour.  "These poor creatures are suffering from a severe identity
crisis" says Dr. Shrink Wrap.  "You see, they were built to UP
specifications and had UP initials sprayed all over them when built. 
Plus, they have toilets from Santa Fe locomotives. Family bonds are the
greatest amongst those locomotives that have the same style of crapper. 
And, these things have no connection to the Susquehanna.  They've never
been to New Jersey, and have never heard of _Railpace_ or Jim Boyd".

At press time, police continued to watch the locomotives, looking for any
sign of movement.  "They seem to be looking at a copy of _Flimsies_" said
one policeman.  "If so, that supports Dr. Shrink Wrap's theory that the
units might next try to escape across the Mississippi River.  We'll have
to keep an eye on them.  Of course, having all these railfans around means
that we can go eat donuts and then come back without fear of missing
anything".

----------------------------------------
Although the NYS&W SD70M's haven't forcefully busted their way out of
VMV, they might (and I stress _might_) be headed home this weekend.  Spies
at VMV indicate that the engines were moved from beside the paint shop up
towards the main building today (Thursday, June 15), and that by 4pm were
sitting on the track leading out of the property.  However, if the
locomotives are ready to leave, they probably won't leave VMV property
until tomorrow, and won't leave Paducah until Saturday.  I'll keep
everyone posted on further news.