Article View: sci.nanotech
Article #980Come on down to the CRYONICS HUT
From: david.c.newkirk
Date: Sun, 04 Mar 1990 00:44
Date: Sun, 04 Mar 1990 00:44
52 lines
2607 bytes
2607 bytes
Do You Sincerly Want To Live Forever At A Price You Can Afford?
Then Bring Your Head On Down To ...
AKBAR & JEFF'S
__ ___ __ ___ __ ___ _____
/ \ | \ \ / / \ |\ | | / \ / | | | | |
| |__/ \ / | | | \ | | | \__ |__| | | |
| | \ | | | | \| | | \ | | | | |
\__/ | \ | \__/ | | _|_ \__/ ___/ | | \__/ |
Not A SCI-FI Pipe
Do you smell --------------------------------- Dream But An Actual
something? I | Check Our Low, Low Prices: | Business Venture!
better check | |
the thermo- | Whole body frozen - $295.99 |
stat... | Head only - $195.99 | YES - We Have
| Brain only - $ 85.99* | Party ICE
| |
| * Plus clean-up fee |
---------------------------------
Shop And Compare!!! 24-HR CARE
Large, comfy
Method of Body Tissue Chances of refrigerators
After-Death Care Results Resuscitation guarded by
-------------------------------------------------- vigilant dogs
| Burial | Decaying | Slim to None | specially trained
-------------------------------------------------| not to lick
| Cremation | Dusty | None | leaky jars!
-------------------------------------------------|
| Burial at Sea | Bloated | None |
-------------------------------------------------| FREE Parking with
| Frozen in a Jar | Lookin' Good | Quite Likely | validation - First
-------------------------------------------------- 431 years free.
Living Again Is The Best Revenge!
Before: (picture of frozen head in a jar)
After: (picture of a strange-looking future person talking to the
head, now grafted onto the body of a small mammal:
"Welcome to the future, X-3957. You owe us $3 billion in
storage fees.")
"Where The Elite Beat The Heat And Avoid Having To Meet St. Pete"
[ Information extracted from a LIFE IN HELL cartoon by Matt Groening, copyright
1988, in Akbar & Jeff's Guide To Life, now in better bookstores everywhere. ]
--
Dave Newkirk, att!ihlpm!dcn
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<Mar.3.19.44.57.1990.6538@athos.rutgers.edu>Path:
arc1-ca.pugleaf.net!utzoo!utgpu!jarvis.csri.toronto.edu!cs.utexas.edu!wuarchive!mit-eddie!rutgers!aramis.rutgers.edu!athos.rutgers.edu!nanotechShow Full Headers
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Path: arc1-ca.pugleaf.net!utzoo!utgpu!jarvis.csri.toronto.edu!cs.utexas.edu!wuarchive!mit-eddie!rutgers!aramis.rutgers.edu!athos.rutgers.edu!nanotech From: dcn@cbnewsd.att.com (david.c.newkirk) Newsgroups: sci.nanotech Subject: Come on down to the CRYONICS HUT Keywords: humor Message-ID: <Mar.3.19.44.57.1990.6538@athos.rutgers.edu> Date: 4 Mar 90 00:44:59 GMT Sender: nanotech@athos.rutgers.edu Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories Lines: 52 Approved: nanotech@aramis.rutgers.edu