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Article #6189LATE, GREAT DR. VELIKOVSKY'S ANNUAL HALLOWEEN SEANCE
From: Ed Conrad
Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 06:06
Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 06:06
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< During a seance late last night -- an annual tradition to celebrate Halloween -- we were again able to reach the late, great Dr. Immanuel Velikovsky way out in the Great Beyond. He said he'll be tied up on Halloween, so agreed to hold the seance a bit earlier this year. < (Granted, Dr. Velikovsky is still a bit bitter about how today's pseudoscientists' grandpas had persecuted his hallowed name, and how today's batch are following in their disgusting footsteps.) < Well, anyway, Dr. Velikovsky once again agreed to read part of the first chapter of his masterpiece, "Worlds in Collision," written more than a half-century ago. < So let's get right to it... Will one of you pseudos from talk.origins please turn out the light (CLICK!) < Okay, Dr. Velikovsky, the floor is your's. < < ===================== < Hmm! Hmm! Okay! < Worlds in Collision, 'er < WORLDS IN COLLISION < Well, here goes! < In a immense universe a little globe revolves around... < Dr. Velikovsky! Sorry to interrupt! Can you PLEASE speak a little louder. Some of these pseudos are hard of hearing. < SURE, HOW'S THIS, ED? < Uh, well, I think you're TOO loud now, Immanuel. < How's this? < Good. Real good! < Are you ready? < We can't wait! < Well, here goes... < My name is Immanuel Velikovsky and I died a long time ago, and back in 1950, when the Phillies won the pennant, my book was published and .. < Dr. Velikovsky, JUST read from your book, okay? The pseudos don't have all day... 'er, night. < Hmmm! Well, okay! Hope I don't flub any lines. < > ================== < > WORLDS IN COLLISION < In an immense universe a little globe revolves around a star; it is the third in the row -- Mercury, Venus, Earth -- of the planetary family. < It is of a solid core covered over most of its surface with liquid, and it has a gaseous envelope. Living creatures fill the liquid; other living creatures fly in the gas; and still others creep and walk upon the ground on the bottom of the gaseous ocean. < Man, a being of erect stature, thinks himself the prince of creation. He felt like this long before he, by his own efforts, came to know how to fly on wings of metal around the globe. He felt godlike long before he could talk to his fellow-man on the other side of the globe. < Today he can see the microcosm in a drop and the elements in the stars. He knows the laws governing the living cell with its chromosomes, and the laws governing the macrocosm of the sun, moon, planets and stars. < He assumes that gravitation keeps the planetary system together, man and beast on their planet, the sea within its borders. < For millions and millions of years, he maintains, the planets have rolled along the same paths, and their moons around them, and man in these eons has arisen from a one-cell infusorium all the long way up to the ladder to his status of Homo sapiens. < Is man's knowledge now nearly complete? Are only a few more steps necessary to conquer the universe: to extract the energy of the atom -- since these pages were written this has already been done -- to cure cancer, to control genetics, to communicate with other planets and learn if they have living creatures, too <. Here begins Homo ignoramus. He does not know what life is or how it came to be and whether it originated form inorganic matter. He does not know whether other planets of this sun or of other suns have life on them, and if they have, whether the forms of life there are like those around us, ourselves included. < He does not know how this solar system came into being, although he has built up a few hypotheses about it. He knows only that the solar system was constructed billions of years ago. < He does not know what this mysterious force of gravitation is that holds him and his fellow man on the other side of the planet with their feet on the ground, although he regards the phenomenon itself as "the law of laws." < He does not know what the earth looks like five miles under his feet. He does not know how mountains came into existence or what caused the emergence of the continents, although he builds hypotheses about these, nor does he know from where oil came -- again hypotheses. < He does not know why, only a short time ago, a thick glacial sheet pressed upon most of Europe and North America, as he believes it did; nor how palms could grow above the polar circle, nor how it came about that the same fauna fill the inner lakes of the Old and the New World. < He does not know where the salt in the sea came from. < Although man knows that he has lived on this planet for millions of years, he finds a recorded history of only a few thousand years. And even these few thousand years are not sufficiently well known. < Why did the Bronze Age precede the Iron Age even though iron is more widely distributed over the world and its manufacture is simpler than that of the alloy of copper and tin? < By what mechanical means were structures of immense blocks built on the high mountains of the Andes? < What caused the legend of the Flood to originate in all the countries of the world? Is there any adequate meaning to the term "antediluvian"? From what experiences grew the eschatological pictures of the end of the world? < In this work, of which the present book is the first part, some of these questions will be answered, but only at the cost of giving up certain notions now regarded as sacred laws in science -- the millions of years of the present constitution of the solar system and the harmonious revolution of the earth -- with all their implications as regards the theory of evolution ... < > ============= < Hey, Ed, Sorry! Gotta go! Perhaps I can finish my book sometime soon. Gee, I hope the pseudos liked it so far. < Oh, I'm sure they didn't, Dr. Velikovsky, although they may dislike the following photo even more. Damn shame you never saw it while you were alive. You weren't exaggerating when you mentioned "an immense universe." < =================================================== < > INTELLIGENT DESIGNER, IS THIS REALLY, REALLY YOU? This is the Hubble Telescope's 2004 ultra view photo, one that was taken of a totally blackened sky as seen through an EIGHT-FOOT-STRAW. Result: galaxies upon galaxies upon galaxies, meaning that our universe is far bigger than we can even begin to fathom. < http://www.spacedaily.com/images/hubble-ultradeep-desk-1024.jpg < ================================= < And now a word from our sponsor... < =================================== < > CRIME IN RHYME The anthros, their interests SO vested And Poor Truth for too long molested Their deceit and deception Near the point of perfection If it were my call, they'd ALL be arrested > ==================================== < PETRIFIED BONES EMBEDDED IN SLATE FROM COAL VEINS < http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-002S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-003S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-004S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-005S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-006S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-007S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-008S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-009S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-010S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-011S.JPG http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/NewFossils/MVC-012S.JPG < It means the bone has to be older than the material in which it is encased. < Same as many thousands of other petrified bones, teeth and soft organs I've discovered between anthracite veins, they offer the undeniable physical evidence that large land animals -- man included -- had existed on earth while coal was being formed more than 280 million years ago. < And it means that Charles Darwin's Theory of Evolution ain't worth the paper it was written on. < ========================================== < < MAN AS OLD AS COAL < (All Specimens Discovered Between Anthracite Veins) < http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/OldestHumanSkull.JPG http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/HumanBrain.jpg http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/ManasOldasCoal/Discoveries.jpg http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/FirstDiscovery.jpg http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/Evidence/MoreFossils.jpg http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/ManasOldasCoal.jpg http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/TestResults.jpg < COAL-AGE MAN-MADE HANDLE FOR WEAPON OR TOOL http://www.edconrad.com/ebay/FOSSILS/OldestTool.jpg < Ed Conrad http://www.edconrad.com Man as Old as Coal < ========================== < < > A FEW MAJOR WORLD NEWSPAPERS > A FEW FOREIGN NEWSPAPERS > BRITISH NEWSPAPERS Barnet Times Biggin Hill News Bishops Stortford Citizen Chingford Guardian Croydon Guardian Ealing Times Edgware Times Epping Forest Guardian Epsom Guardian Enfield and Haringey Independent Evening Standard Hampstead and Highgate Express (Ham & High) Harlow Citizen Harrow Times Hillingdon Times Hounslow Guardian Ilford Recorder Kingston Guardian Leyton Guardian London Daily Metro Newham Recorder News Shopper Ongar Guardian Redhill And Reigate Life Richmond and Twickenham Times Romford Recorder South London Press Streatham Guardian Sutton Guardian Waltham Abbey Guardian Waltham Forest Guardian Wandsworth Guardian Wanstead and Woodford Guardian Westmorland Gazette Wharf Wimbledon Guardian West Briton Western Daily Press (Bristol) Western Gazette (Yeovil) Western Morning News (Plymouth) West Somerset Free Press Wiltshire News Wiltshire Times Wilts & Glos Standard Yeovil Clarion Brackley and Towcester Advertiser Boston Standard Buxton Advertiser Daventry Express Derby Evening Telegraph Derbyshire Times Eastwood Advertiser Evening Telegraph (Kettering) Grantham Journal Grimsby Evening Telegraph Harborough Mail Hinckley Times Horncastle News Hucknall & Bulwell Dispatch Ilkeston Advertiser Leicester Mercury Lincolnshire Echo Lincolnshire Free Press Louth Leader Mansfield Chad Mansfield Chronicle Matlock Mercury Melton Times Newark Advertiser Northampton Chronicle & Echo Northamptonshire Evening Telegraph Nottingham Evening Post Retford Guardian Ripley & Heanor News Rutland Mercury Rutland Times Scunthorpe Evening Telegraph Skegness Standard Spalding Guardian Stamford Mercury Worksop Guardia Bedford Times and Citizen Borehamwood News Bury Free Press Brentwood Gazette Cambridge Evening News Cambs Times (March) Dunmow Broadcast East Anglian Daily Times (Ipswich) Eastern Counties Network EDP24 - comprehensive East Anglia news site. 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X-Google-Thread: f44bc,a03048c941d4d58b,start X-Google-Thread: fcca9,a03048c941d4d58b,start X-Google-Thread: f64bc,a03048c941d4d58b,start X-Google-Thread: f693b,a03048c941d4d58b,start X-Google-Attributes: gidf44bc,gidfcca9,gidf64bc,gidf693b,public X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII Path: arc1-ca.pugleaf.net!g2news2.google.com!news3.google.com!border1.nntp.dca.giganews.com!nntp.giganews.com!nx01.iad01.newshosting.com!newshosting.com!130.81.64.211.MISMATCH!cycny01.gnilink.net!spamkiller2.gnilink.net!gnilink.net!trndny01.POSTED!2e516acb!not-for-mail From: Ed Conrad <edconrad@verizon.net> Newsgroups: sci.skeptic,dc.smithsonian,sci.anthropology.paleo,alt.fan.cecil-adams Subject: LATE, GREAT DR. VELIKOVSKY'S ANNUAL HALLOWEEN SEANCE Reply-To: edconrad@verizon.net Message-ID: <i9pgj298eq4siffmijb6tdsk85sfsjnmb1@4ax.com> X-Newsreader: Forte Agent 2.0/32.652 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit Lines: 1122 Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 06:06:06 GMT NNTP-Posting-Host: 71.241.120.121 X-Complaints-To: abuse@verizon.net X-Trace: trndny01 1161324366 71.241.120.121 (Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:06:06 EDT) NNTP-Posting-Date: Fri, 20 Oct 2006 02:06:06 EDT