🚀 go-pugleaf

Husband went to the Giants' game...

...after being granted an approved permission slip!

*************************************************************************
APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE BOYS

Name of Boyfriend/Fianc�/Husband:

I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest authority
in my life for the following period:
										
Date:				Time of departure:
Time of return:		NOT to exceed:		

Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only visit the
locations stated below, at the stated times. I agree to refrain from
hitting on or flirting with other women.  I shall not even speak to
another female, except as expressly permitted in writing below. I will
not turn off my mobile after two pints, nor shall I consume above the
allowed volume of alcohol without first phoning for a taxi AND calling
you for a verbal waiver of said alcohol allowance. I understand that
even if permission is granted to go out, my girlfriend/fianc�/wife
retains the right to be pissed off with me the following week for no
valid reason whatsoever.

Amount of alcohol allowed (units)
 Beer:		  Wine:		     Liquor:		Total:

Locations to be visited:


Females with whom conversation
is permitted:


*IMPORTANT - STRIPPER CLAUSE: Not withstanding the female contact
permitted above, I promise to refrain from coming within one hundred
(100) feet of a stripper or exotic dancer.  Violation of this Stripper
Clause shall be grounds for immediate termination of the relationship.

I acknowledge my position in life. I know who wears the trousers in
our relationship, and I agree it's not me. I promise to abide by your
rules & regulations. I understand that this is going to cost me a
fortune in chocolates & flowers. You reserve the right to obtain and
use my credit cards whenever you wish to do so. I hereby promise to
take you on an unlimited shopping spree, should I not return home by
the approved time. On my way home, I will not pick a fight with any
stranger, nor shall I conduct in depth discussions with the said
entity. Upon my return home, I promise not to urinate anywhere other
than in the toilet. In addition, I will refrain from waking you up,
breathing my vile breath in your face, and attempting to breed like a
(drunken) rabbit.

I declare that to the best of my knowledge (of which I have none
compared to my BETTER half), the above information is correct. 
Signed - Boyfriend/Fianc�/Husband:
														

Request is: APPROVED              DENIED

This decision is not negotiable. If approved, cut permission slip
below and carry at all times.
"�����������������������������������������
Permission for my boyfriend/fianc�/husband to be away for the
following period of time:
Date:			Time of departure:				Time of return:

Signed - Girlfriend/Fianc�/Wife:	

*************************************************************************

Hee hee.

~Queenie, with thanks to my friend in the UK for sending this along.

(Not Paul.  Paul obviously went too close to the stripper...)