🚀 go-pugleaf

qxz314@hotmail.com wrote:
> 
> A while ago someone posted a question in this ng asking for info on
> transgender friendly cities.  I am now making this post for one reason: I live
> in San Francisco, which several people indicated in their replies as being a
> quite livable city for transgendered individuals.  I seriously question this,
> however, not because of this city's friendliness or unfriendliness towards
> TSs, but because of its unfriendliness towards people in general.  San
> Francisco has become hell to live in.

I can definitely relate to that, and I've lived in San Francisco for 16
years now. People treat each other like shit here, they are viciously
rude to each other in traffic, and in any public place, notably any
place where there is a point of sale.

"Me first, get outta my way" is the catchphrase here, and the insane
frequency with which people run red lights and stop signs as well as cut
each other off in traffic is a prime indicator of the near total
collapse of civility in this hole.
The way they treat each other in traffic is an exellent metaphor for
their regard for each other in general. I was hit four times by drivers
running red lights and stop signs before I just quit driving altogether.
I want to live, and they are so desperately selfish out there that they
will risk your life and their own as well just to be first at the light
where they have to stop anyway!

They will cut each other off even on foot, and walk right into you on
the sidewalks because they can't be bothered to step to one side or the
other. They will try to cut in lines by forming their own line off to
the side of the one you are standing in. 

In coffee houses they will reach right across you putting their arm in
your face as you get cream and sugar for your coffee, rather than wait
their damn turn, and at points of sale people will be pushing you out of
the way from behind before you can put your goddamn change in your purse
after you pay for something.

People here are just desperately selfish here, and just about totally
insincere as well. Finding someone who is actually available as a friend
is next to impossible, unless you have something they want. The rule
seems to be "sincerity is everything, once you can fake that you've got
it made."

Offers of friendly support are plentiful: "just call me if you need
anything" but they are never followed through on. If you call its "Oh
gosh I'm just so BUSY!" or "I'm not feeling well, I have a sore throat."
I got all sorts of offers of help before leaving for SRS, and they all
copped out when I got back with only one exception.

People here want to make all the right friendly and supportive noises so
they can feel good about themselves cheaply, but they sure as hell don't
want to make good on them! Phonies abound here.

This is about the only place I've ever lived where if you invite someone
over to dinner they act like you are imposing on them. If they do come
you can be sure they will never reciprocate. 

> Maybe this just applies to me - I acknowledge that some people may be able to
> live well-attuned, happy lives here.  But I seriously doubt it.  The level of
> competition for resources here - especially housing which has become
> ridiculously scarce - has created a culture that is increasingly calloused to
> the suffering of others.  

Agreed! I'm being forced out of my apartment by some truly dirty tricks
on the part of the landlord who knows that I don't have the money or the
strength to fight it because I just had my surgery, and this is so that
he can jack up the rent.

> This suffering is on display everywhere one turns in
> the City: People on the streets with nothing to their name and only a look of
> resignation at the hopelessness of their situation in their eyes.

Oh, well you are only seeing them because our fabulous mayor threw them
all out of Golden Gate Park and onto our streets. He sure does know how
to solve the homeless problem, eh?

> I am dismayed at the way things are in this city, and what people will accept
> in order to live in a place that is "liberal".  

"Liberal?" What does that mean?

 
> I do not have rich parents, I do not make money from people paying exorbitant
> rents on my real estate property, I do not have a trust fund.  I work as a
> low- to mid-level administrative assistant and am happy to get a fair wage for
> my work.  

Well if you do you won't be able to live on it here!

>This used to be enough to get by, but now the tides have turned.  It
> is becoming possible to live decently in the City anymore (maybe it already
> has and I simply can't admit it).

you are getting warm...

> I think this city is a trap which appears to offer many things to people but
> which in the end exacts a very high price.  And someone has to pay.  I guess
> I'm sick of paying what seems like more than my share.

Me too! That price, BTW, is far more than monetary.

> I am tired of hearing people praise San Francisco as some sort of great haven.
> I think when people start saying this, it would be good to probe them a little
> bit and find out what they are really doing, how they really live, and what
> (if any) sort of values they adhere to in life.  I think you will find a lot
> of emptiness.

You will get no argument from me on that.

> This is my take on the situation.  I would love to hear what others have to
> say.  And if anyone really knows of a better place out there, I would love to
> know where it is if it exists.
> 

I have my eye on a place about 6,000 ft. up in the Sierras, where people
value each other and treat each other with respect, civility, and
courtesy. I'm sick of how people treat each other here, and I am
planning my escape.


Amy
 -- 
     |\_/|                    .-----------------------------------.
     | @ @    Woof!           |   Amy Lewis (amy@usfca.edu)       |
     |   <>              _    |                                   |
     |  _/\------____ ((| |)) |  A dog may bark all night, but    |
     |               `--' |   |  his legs will not grow longer.   |
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