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Article #195

"Advanced Boring"

#195
From: 'David Ersatz Haderach O'Bedlam'
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 1999 00:00
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So I took my big book on the Spanish Inquisition -- which says, by 
the way, that said campaign was due more to "racial" anti-semitism
than to excess of zeal at rooting out Christian heresies -- up to
People's Park for the free vegan lunch (consisting of, today, pearl 
barley, salad and curried squash), picked up a free loaf of fancy-
schmancy bread while I was at it, and, while short-cutting through 
UC campus the on my way home, came across a sawhorse-thing, marking 
off some kind of repair or construction project, with a sign on the 
front reading "ADVANCED BORING."

Now that, of course, is a great subject line for the kind of drivel
I like to spooge across Usenet. IHNJH,IJLS "ADVANCED BORING." Which
of course explains this piece of Usenet jetsam here.

I forgot to mention that I stopped on campus to watch the squirrels
be properly squirrelly (those creatures sure chew their food well),
and that, among the other fauna, I encountered an old street hippie
who handed me a *still-warm* baked potato. Which, with the loaf of 
free "gourmet" bread I'd mentioned earlier and a quart of milk you
hadn't suspected existed before now (and that I actually paid for),
along with (of course) coffee and (maybe) left-over rum, will fill 
my tummy and gladden my spirit at least once more before it's time
for Davey to try to get some frigging sleep again -- and then head 
out yet again in the A.M. for free hot cereal in a church basement.

"ADVANCED BORING." Doesn't that sound like a 400-level course, one 
that should be accompanied by a mandatory lab? "Required for Urban
Studies majors." (There'll be lots of papers to write and a bunch
of long multiple-choice quizzes, but I'd teach it myself -- naked.) 

So there are worse things one could be in life than a poor, homely,
potbellied freak paying 5/7 of his income for a tiny shabby room in 
a "residential hotel" in Berkeley, hence maybe I won't have to kill 
myself anytime in the near future. As long as the weather holds (as
noted in a previous post, it was SUNNY AND WARM here today), and as
long as do-gooders are still sensitized against the idea of human 
beings literally starving to death in the streets, even a wretched
and lonely existence such as mine (in which I ain't had sex since
March of 1998) might continue to be more or less bearable. ("Weep,
child, weep...")

"ADVANCED BORING." Now *there's* a high-tech Career Opportunity!


Sheesh. 



Drivelishly,
TheDavid(TM)


P.S. I'm getting lots of exercise. Maybe by Spring I'll be *SEXY*.

- -- 
'It never occurred to me to think of Sara Teasdale as sarcastic.' -ME
SEND MONEY!> David, P.O. Box 236, Berkeley, CA 94704 U.S.A <SEND BOMBS!
 "What's a deer but a chicken with horns?" --Moggin, being sarcastic.

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From: 'David "Ersatz Haderach" O'Bedlam' <thedavid@tsoft.com>
Subject: "Advanced Boring"
Date: 1999/12/31
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