🚀 go-pugleaf

But we're just F---R-----I----E-----N----D-----S!  Her name isn't Sophie
is it?

-= Zomola =- wrote:
> 
> Reasons why Sheep are better than Women
> 
> * Sheep don't have a gag reflex, or upper teeth
> * You can get a better grip on a sheep's ear
> * Sheep don't shy away from boots and leather
> * Cotton mouth is easier to get rid of than a social disease
> * Nuttin' beats mutton
> * Sheep won't argue about whose turn it is to go get a towel
> * Sheep won't drink your liquor, smoke your weed, snort your coke,
>   and then tell you they have to be home early
> * Sheep never ask if you're ready to settle down
> * Sheep never ask about you former lovers and then get pissed off
>   when you tell them
> * No matter how old or ugly you are, you can always find a willing
>   ewe
> * Sheep are never concerned about their reputation
> * Sheep won't tell all their friends about the time you couldn't get
>   it up
> * Sheep won't ask if you're gay the first time you can't get it up
>   for the second time
> * Sheep never insist on eating out
> * You'll never catch your sheep masturbating to a picture of Mel
>   Gibson
> * Sheep don't get suspicious if you have to work late
> * Sheep don't smell like tuna fish
> * Sheep don't get moody once a month
> * You can eat a lamb chop without getting wool stuck in your teeth
> * A sheep doesn't expect you to support her for the rest of her life
>   after one roll in the hay
> * A sheep never wears curlers and a mud pack to bed
> * A sheep doesn't stop screwing after the honeymoon
> * A sheep won't get drunk and throw up in your car
> * A sheep won't think that a weekend stay-over entitles her to
>   rearrange your furniture and put up new curtains
> * A sheep won't expect you to pay...and pay...and pay...and pay
> * A sheep will never complain about the spittoon in your pickup
> * A sheep will never throw out your old copies of Playboy
> * A sheep won't care of you keep your fish bait in the refrigerator
> * A sheep won't get even with you by spending your paycheck on new
>   clothes, none of which are see-through or meant to be worn in the
>   bedroom
> * A sheep will never sue you for alimony
> * A sheep won't care if you screw her sister
> * A sheep won't care if your secretary is better looking than she is
> * A sheep will never tell you the ceiling needs to be painted while
>   you're screwing
> * A sheep won't use your razor to shave it's legs, or your
>   pocketknife to open a paint can
> * Sheep never have a headache
> * A sheep won't give your favorite hunting shirt to Goodwill
> * A sheep won't leave wet nylons hanging all over the bathroom
> * A sheep will never ask you to stop on the way home from work and
>   pick up a box of tampons
> * Sheep grow their own fur coats
> * A sheep will never leave a vibrator on the living room couch when
>   you're having friends over to watch football
> * Sheep won't cheat on you with your best friend
> * A sheep will never ask if you'll still respect her in the morning
> * Sheep aren't into talking before or after sex
> * A sheep never yells at you for leaving the lid up
> * A sheep won't send you out for batteries for her vibrator
> * A sheep doesn't think it's demeaning or kinky to do it doggy style
> * A sheep won't mind if you put up mirrors in the bedroom
> * Sheep are "ram tough"
> * A sheep won't think your cheap and tacky if you:  send daisies
>   instead of long-stemmed red roses, tip less than 20%, wear levis
>   with a hole in the seat, open beer bottles with your teeth
> * Sheep don't mind if you leave the lights on
> * Sheep don't mind doing it in the morning
> * Sheep don't mind doing it in a pickup truck
> * A sheep will never use the excuse that:  she just did her nails,
>   its too hot, its too cold, you'll wake the kids, you'll wake the
>   neighbors, she's too drunk to enjoy it, she's not drunk enough to
>   enjoy it
> * A sheep will never turn up being your long lost cousin
> * Wool burn is better than carpet burn
> * Sheep will always love ewe
> * Sheep don't care about the size of your penis, since they're all
>   white
> * Sex with a sheep is never baaaaaad
> * and last but not least:
>  A SHEEP WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU FOR A CUCUMBER
> 
> ---------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> Zomola's Website     :  http://www.humorplein.nl
> 
> 15 new funny movies (MPG), a.o. Bill Clinton, Striptease, Driving
> School, Axe commercial, Mr. Bean and The woman in the Elevator.
> Games: Sesamstraat (Dutch) + Stripball.
> New game: Beat Up Your Computer!
> MP3: ao. Britney Spears parody "Boobies One More Size".
> 
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> -= ZOMOLA's JOKE BOX (C) -=- ZOMOLA's JOKE BOX (C) =-
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> --
> |Fidonet:  -= Zomola =- 2:280/1126.33
> |Internet: zomola@madcat.xs4all.geenspam.nl