🚀 go-pugleaf

In article <179591@pyramid.pyramid.com>, smithers@pyrhard2.eng.pyramid.com (John Milford Smithers) writes:
|> Dating services, personals, its all maddening.  I read personals and use them
|> to beat myself up.  I always find ways in which I don't qualify.  They want
|> a professional.  What is a professional?  I'm an engineering tech.  Does that
|> qualify as a prof?  Attractive...  I'm overweight.  When I feel good, I feel
|> attractive, when I don't, I'm not.  Atheletic...  I'm in martial arts and am
|> developing and interest in bicycling.  Given the fact of my weight, do I still
|> qualify as atheletic?  I can't imagine replying to or writing a personal.
|> I feel that I must be honest and don't know how to package myself.  I suppose
|> what it comes down to is that if someone isn't interested because of my weight,
|> to hell with them, but this isn't an easy attitude for me to maintain.  
|> 
|> In case you haven't figured it out yet, yes, I do have self-esteem problems.
|> On the other hand, these are very real questions and so are the feelings.
|> 

If you are concerned about you're weight, only reply to the ones that
say _they_ are "attractive".  Generally, the ones that are "thin" give
a height and weight.  If you read the ads for a while, you can get an
idea which words mean they consider themselves overweight.  Basically,
no one who considers themselves overweight can criticize you for the
same.  And take into consideration that the majority of women think
they are overweight, even the ones that are average.  So, the chances
of them finding you unattractive because of your weight are probably
less than what you think.

Also, don't try to take it all in one jump.  Make the initial goal to
find some that you are interested to talk to about possibly going out.
After you find a selection of ones you are willing to date, then you
can tackle the problem of choosing one.

It sounds to me like just answering a few of these and getting to know
them "socially" might improve your self-esteem, even if you never date
any of them.

--Rich Wingerter