🚀 go-pugleaf

dcmntrys <dcmntrys@ix.netcom.com> wrote in article
<57qrno$1me@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>...
> >My question for all you single guys out ther is simple----what is
the
> >deal with not calling after saying you will??  Women prefer
honesty
> and would rather not hear things such as "I'll call you"   "I'll be
in
> >touch" etc unless you really mean it.
> 
> I have to confess that I did that and I am female. I just didn't
want
> to hurt his feelings. What do you suggest we say?

If I have been out with a guy and I really don't like him, for
whatever reason, I feel that it's wrong to ask him to phone or to
give him a phone number, even a correct number.  Most men, in my
opinion, would not like to be led on either.  The excuse is often
given, "I don't want to hurt his feelings", or, "I don't know how to
let hime down".   Truthfully, if the situation were reversed, and it
has been, I hate it when the guy doesn't call and lead me to believe
he would.  

Even though the dreaded LETS BE FRIENDS is a hateful cliche response,
sometimes it's all you can use.  If I tell the guy, I had fun and you
can call me if you want to go out on a friendly basis, or something
to that effect, he knows right away that you don't really want to
have this go any further.  It's his option then if he would like to
pursue a friendship.  Things become difficult when we forget that men
and women can be friends and it's ok.  Sometimes we forget that
dating doesn't always have to end up in bed and that sometimes if you
make a great friend you have gotten a lot more for yourself and your
future than that time in bed.  

Don't be afraid to tell your date how you feel.  I believe they will
appreciate the honesty even if they were hoping for more.  After all,
you can't give more than you feel and to lead a person on is very
hurtful and the only result is anger an pain.  If it is handled
correctly, the result may be a long term friendship.