🚀 go-pugleaf

In article <45eetn$j3m@transfer.stratus.com>,
John Fereira <fereira@isis.com> wrote:
>In article <45e7h3$d15@crl.crl.com> gunhed@crl.com (Steve Chaney) writes:
>>In article <45e3hj$19l@transfer.stratus.com>,
>>John Fereira <fereira@isis.com> wrote:
>>>In article <459st1$sh4@crl.crl.com> gunhed@crl.com (Steve Chaney) writes:
>>>>
>>>>In article <457s5u$c3g@news.computek.net>, Fish <> wrote:
>>>>>If you find it not within you, you will never find it without
>>>>
>>>>And how do you develop it within you?
>>>>
>>>>It's as simple to wake up one day and say "I'm confident!  I'm happy!" as
>>>>it is for a dead battery to suddenly recharge itself.
>>>>
>>>>Think on that.
>>> 
>>>I did and wondered what purpose that analogy serves.  It's quite true
>>>that confidence isn't something that is going develop overnight but is 
>>>that really a problem?  The analogy seems to indicate that you see the
>>>advocacy of inherent confidence as an instant solution to the "dating
>>>problem".  So what if developing confidence *does* take time.  It's still
>>>a reasonable goal to achieve that is going to make someone more attractive
>>>to a MOTAS.  No, you don't just wake up one day and "I'm confident.  I'm
>>>happy."  If you're doing this then you probably really aren't.  If the
>>>confidence and sense of happiness develops over time eventually you just
>>>"know" and don't have to reinforce it by telling yourself that you are.
>>>There is no such thing as "acting confident".  Either you are or you're not.
>>
>>And so your punishment until you conform (become confident) is isolation
>>from MOTAS?
> 
>Of course not.  I never wrote anything that would imply such a thing and
>if you had read anything that I wrote in the past along these lines you
>would see that I have advocated exactly the opposite.  The best way to
>become more confident around a MOTAS is to spend more time just talking
>to people that possess the gender of your preference (or all people, for
>that matter).  Stop (not you specifically) thinking of everyone that is a 
>MOTAS as a potential romantic interest or even distinguishing those that
>might be and those that would not, and just treat them all the same, and
>it becomes easier to be more comfortable around a MOTAS.  Geez,  I just
>read this morning how you weren't going to twist the meaning of the articles
>that you responded to but you certainly seemed to write something that
>was never intended or implied in the article that I wrote just a few
>hours later.

Well, fine - never meant to distort your comments.  Personally I think it
is wise to enter into a situation where you can talk to MOTOS (sorry I'm
not politically correct :), and not need to swoop on someone on the spot.
Now, when you're stuck in a situation where your daily life includes only
exposure to members of the "un-appropriate" sex (as was my last job), and
you don't know where to meet MOTOS after-hours - except bars - what do you
do?  What can you do?  Ask everyone you meet, every day, "Hey, do you know
where I can meet women at?"

Surely that's stupid - but what else can you do?


-- Steve