🚀 go-pugleaf

The Olympics are over and your summer is threatening to return to its usual 
sweltering tedium.  You long to relive those moments of joy and despair in 
Atlanta, but fear that a sedative like an afternoon Cubs game is the best 
you'll get.  Not so fast!  Your friends at OlympInc, the official Olympics 
product distributors, are proud to present their full line of life-like 
Olympic Action Figures--The 1996 OlympBots!  These 8-inch non-toxic, durable, 
flexible polyurethane replicas come with removable limbs to simulate realistic 
athletic injuries, and are fashioned after actual participants in the Atlanta 
Games.  Now you and your family can resurrect the summer's glorious highlights 
from the comfort of your own home!  Curse along with your favorite 
steroid-enhanced Slavic weightlifter as he drops the barbell on his feet!  
Cringe as the little Chinese swimmer is dragged back to the mainland to be 
sterilized after losing the 400-meter individual medley!  Play a round of 
'Guess The Testosterone Level' as the Eastern European Female Gymnastics Team 
is introduced!  Watch in awe and horror as courageous little Kerri Strug 
vaults her way to a leg injury, only to be "rescued" by personal coach Bela 
Karolyi, who savors yet another chance to get his grubby paws on the firm, 
milky thighs of a teenage girl!  Pray that Gail Devers doesn�t blow her chance 
to become the world�s fastest female after tripping over her own hideously 
deformed fingernail claws!  Perform routine urine tests on the rest of the 
runners to make sure they're not getting a little "help" from their friends!  
Whine and moan along with the Dream Team until their hotel finally supplies 
their favorite brand of caviar!  Yes, you'll receive these characters and 
others, as well as athletic equipment replicas and even a broadcast booth 
where you too can provide uneven, heavily biased coverage of the events.  And, 
if you act immediately, you'll receive absolutely free--Richard, the 
suspicious hillbilly security guard (life-like bad beard included)!  Help us 
exploit the full commercial potential of the Olympic Games before the summer 
slips away!   






"A CANDY-COLORED CLOWN THEY CALL THE SANDMAN"