🚀 go-pugleaf

In article <NEWTNews.836096120.10476.pizazz@ppp.calvary.net> CFNCO@pizazz.com writes:
>From: CFNCO@pizazz.com
>Subject: "I have killed again."
>Date: Sat, 29 Jun 96 17:37:40 PDT

(snip)

>read about other experiences in my book "One night in Bang-Cock." These 
>are true life stories about the most dangerous job in America- the 
>midnight shift at convience stores. They don't call this the graveyard 
>shift for nothing these days. The company I work for won't allow me to use 
>their name but my hours are from eleven to seven.

Um, let's see ... working alone behind the counter of a place with money at a 
time when 99% of America is sleeping. You speak as if someone coming in with 
weaponry to relieve you of your cash register surprises you. You also speak as 
if working in a place with money at a time when 99% of all America is sleeping 
is an intelligent thing to do.

<snip>

>Please buy my book so I can get out of this job, I don't want to kill 
>again! 

Or -- duh -- you might just think about getting a *day* job, Sherlock.




>[Editors note: The above was communicated to me by the author himself. 
>No crime was committed, but I thought the readers of *.books and *.lit 
>would be interested because the clerk is also the author of a book. 
>*.forsale groups need no explaination.]

CFNCO@pizazz.com wrote:
> 
> Catchy headline isn't it? Makes you think.

Yeah .. it made me think that this must be your English 101 exercise for
the summer at Mesa. I hope you're taking Pass/No Pass option ... I 
wonder who this "author" is, eh?  You ought to get your ass kicked for
being unfunny and for being stupid enough to spam this crap around ...




> 
> Well, it's true. This past weekend I killed two people. They're dead.  gun.
> > 
> Send a check to CFNCO for $7.11 US dollars.(Expect delivery in 4 to 6
> weeks.)
> CFNCO Book Sales
> P.O. Box 301291 "A"
> Escondido CA, 92030
> 
> Please buy my book so I can get out of this job, I don't want to kill
> again!
> 
> [Editors note: The above was communicated to me by the author himself.
> No crime was committed, but I thought the readers of *.books and *.lit
> would be interested because the clerk is also the author of a book.
> *.forsale groups need no explaination.]

Scott Buckner wrote:
> 
> In article <NEWTNews.836096120.10476.pizazz@ppp.calvary.net> CFNCO@pizazz.com writes:
> >From: CFNCO@pizazz.com
> >Subject: "I have killed again."
> >Date: Sat, 29 Jun 96 17:37:40 PDT
> 
> (snip)
> 
> >read about other experiences in my book "One night in Bang-Cock." These
> >are true life stories about the most dangerous job in America- the
> >midnight shift at convience stores. They don't call this the graveyard
> >shift for nothing these days. The company I work for won't allow me to use
> >their name but my hours are from eleven to seven.
> 
> Um, let's see ... working alone behind the counter of a place with money at a
> time when 99% of America is sleeping. You speak as if someone coming in with
> weaponry to relieve you of your cash register surprises you. You also speak as
> if working in a place with money at a time when 99% of all America is sleeping
> is an intelligent thing to do.
> 
> <snip>
> 
> >Please buy my book so I can get out of this job, I don't want to kill
> >again!
> 
> Or -- duh -- you might just think about getting a *day* job, Sherlock.
> 

Wait a minute, let me see here: You have a shoulder and -um- just GUESSING 
here... there was at ONE time a chip there, which said and particular to you 
chip SOMEONE knocked off???  And it was this guy at 7-11 and you think he 
should give it back to you?  Or you waned to write this book first, he beat 
you to it, and now you're pissed that there's no more literary reason to quit 
your day job as car-wash attendent, having exhausted your extensive list of 
New York publishers interested in that particular genre...

How's THAT for Sherlocking?

Eagerly awaiting your heated reply. :-/
-- 
All typos are copyright 1996, Dearmad Productions, to be used
solely in the production of Dearmad missives.  Any violators (those
who use SIMILAR typos) will be punished to the fiullest extent of
the lew!

In article <31D8A71F.4C13@earthlink.net> Dearmad <dearmad@earthlink.net> writes:

>Scott Buckner wrote:

>> >Please buy my book so I can get out of this job, I don't want to kill
>> >again!
>> 
>> Or -- duh -- you might just think about getting a *day* job, Sherlock.
>> 

>Wait a minute, let me see here: You have a shoulder and -um- just GUESSING 
>here... there was at ONE time a chip there, which said and particular to you 
>chip SOMEONE knocked off???  And it was this guy at 7-11 and you think he 
>should give it back to you?  Or you waned to write this book first, he beat 
>you to it, and now you're pissed that there's no more literary reason to quit 
>your day job as car-wash attendent, having exhausted your extensive list of 
>New York publishers interested in that particular genre...

>How's THAT for Sherlocking?

>Eagerly awaiting your heated reply. :-/

Heated response? From me? Nah. 

I will ask, however, whether you were having an intense religious experience 
when you created this posting. By the looks of this sentence structure train 
wreck, I can only assume you were in the midst of speaking in tongues at the 
time. Contrary to what others may have told you, babbling incoherently before 
the entire world not an endearing quality.

I guess "Hooked On Phonics" only goes so far ...

Scott Buckner wrote:
> 
> >How's THAT for Sherlocking?
> 
> >Eagerly awaiting your heated reply. :-/
> 
> Heated response? From me? Nah.
> 
> I will ask, however, whether you were having an intense religious experience
> when you created this posting. By the looks of this sentence structure train
> wreck, I can only assume you were in the midst of speaking in tongues at the
> time. Contrary to what others may have told you, babbling incoherently before
> the entire world not an endearing quality.
> 
> I guess "Hooked On Phonics" only goes so far ...

No, it goes further.  I learned early to spot those who see no humour in 
writing.  They need to read short sentences.  They need sentences which get 
straight to the point.  They need sentences which usually end on the point.  
Phonics also helped me with sounding out all the horrible voices which roam 
in my head and go blather in the midnight hours while I lay awake watching 
the suns swirl about my doghouse in the darkness watching you enter- there 
you are, I see you going around the corner moving like a flamer in the 
midnight hours while I lay awake watching the suns swirl about my 
doghouse in the darkness, and there you were, I saw you going around the 
corner moving like a flamer in the midnight hours while I lay awake watching 
the suns swirls about my food dish, and then, the flames began, climbing 
higher and higher and hotter and hotter!

Gee, thanks for telling me babbling isn't cool.. but not using verbs in your 
sentences isn't so grand either shiny boy.  Also, if your only possible 
assumption is tongues... could that be because of a limited imagination?

-belch-  <-- is that ok?  Ah... I feel better anyway.
-- 
All typos are copyright 1996, Dearmad Productions, to be used
solely in the production of Dearmad missives.  Any violators (those
who use SIMILAR typos) will be punished to the fiullest extent of
the lew!

Scott Buckner wrote:
> 
> >How's THAT for Sherlocking?
> 
> >Eagerly awaiting your heated reply. :-/
> 
> Heated response? From me? Nah.
> 
> I will ask, however, whether you were having an intense religious experience
> when you created this posting. By the looks of this sentence structure train
> wreck, I can only assume you were in the midst of speaking in tongues at the
> time. Contrary to what others may have told you, babbling incoherently before
> the entire world not an endearing quality.
> 
> I guess "Hooked On Phonics" only goes so far ...

No, it goes further.  I learned early to spot those who see no humour in 
writing.  They need to read short sentences.  They need sentences which get 
straight to the point.  They need sentences which usually end on the point.  
Phonics also helped me with sounding out all the horrible voices which roam 
in my head and go blather in the midnight hours while I lay awake watching 
the suns swirl about my doghouse in the darkness watching you enter- there 
you are, I see you going around the corner moving like a flamer in the 
midnight hours while I lay awake watching the suns swirl about my 
doghouse in the darkness, and there you were, I saw you going around the 
corner moving like a flamer in the midnight hours while I lay awake watching 
the suns swirls about my food dish, and then, the flames began, climbing 
higher and higher and hotter and hotter!

Gee, thanks for telling me babbling isn't cool.. but not using verbs in your 
sentences isn't so grand either shiny boy.  Also, if your only possible 
assumption is tongues... could that be because of a limited imagination?

-belch-  <-- is that ok?  Ah... I feel better anyway.
-- 
All typos are copyright 1996, Dearmad Productions, to be used
solely in the production of Dearmad missives.  Any violators (those
who use SIMILAR typos) will be punished to the fiullest extent of
the lew!